First match!

[blockspenguins]

[[The boy showing up on the screen looked...well. Crestfallen to say the least. He pulled his orange headband down a little before finally addressing the screen.]]

I...I'm sorry everyone. [[What's this kid apologizing for?]] We failed. We let the aliens win... [[It was clearly hard to admit, he was visibly trembling.]]

I...there's no excuse. I wasn't strong enough. I'm sorry. [[His fists finally pounded on the console. He was so frustrated, so disappointed in himself. After a moment he sighed, relaxing as best he could. His hands slipped from the console, and he put on a smile.]]

So...who all is here? Mom? Any of my team? How about any other soccer players? Please ah...speak up! I want to know who was saved...

Comments

[Video]

[gomu_ningen]

[His head is practically sideways, cocking it to his shoulder as he pondered the topic with great confundence.]

"Fans? Is it a summer-time thing? Are there like.. Big fans that you have to make a girl run through or something? How do fans get that dangerous?"

[Video]

[true_noir]

Fans? Oh my no. A fan, here, is someone who enjoys soccer. But soccer fans, you see, can be quite violent if their team loses. There have been riots, towns have burned for the results of a game.

[She giggled. She might get the chance to have a bit of fun here...]

[gomu_ningen]

[Magic words, Chloe. Magic words.]

"H-HOW DO I PLAY THIS GAME?!!"

[true_noir]

First of all, do you wish to be one of the fans, or do you wish to be the one with the balls?

[...oh god...]

[gomu_ningen]

I've got balls. Golden ones.

[He's saying this with a very straight face, aside from the finger in his nose.]

[true_noir]

You've already got the balls? Well... gold might be a touch hard to kick, so you might do better as one of the fans. You have the spirit. Choose the team that is most likely to lose. Root for them, shout and hoop and holler with all of your might. Convince everyone that they must win.

When they lose, you will require a baseball bat, or a hunk of wood, at least two by four feet, a bottle of something flammable with a rag in the neck, a lighter or match, a knife and a something to cover your face when the police start throwing tear gas.

Brass knuckles and a kevlar vest would be extra credit.

[Someone... please stop her.]

[gomu_ningen]

Ahh.. H-How do I find all of that stuff? I don't need anything to defend myself 'cept my fists!

[His eyes. My God. They're beaming with an excitement not unlike a dog looking up to a person sitting at a dinner table.]

[true_noir]

If that's the case, just find something you can light on fire and pour it in a bottle. Light the match to the rag and toss. Then, rely on your fists when others come to ... give their opinions.

[gomu_ningen]

So.. Soccer is just fighting other people because you've got balls?

[true_noir]

Well, being a soccer fan tends to mean fighting because your team lost...

And because you have balls. Europeans took the game very seriously.

...so did the South Americans if I recall correctly. I was always surprised that the Americans bothered, really. They're much tamer in their violence.

[gomu_ningen]

[So confused right now. Luffy's brain isn't really picturing this as Endou had also been describing.]

If I'm not a "fan" then what do I get to do?

[true_noir]

You can play. It's quite athletic. Lots of kicking the ball around and trying to get it into the other team's net. Very challenging, since they're trying to stop you, and you can't use your hands.

Good exercise.

[gomu_ningen]

I.. I can't use my hands?! DO THEY CUT THEM OFF?!

[blockspenguins]

Wh--what kind of soccer are you talking about?! That's not how it's played at all!!

[true_noir]

Fans in Europe took their games with lethal severity in my homeworld.

[blockspenguins]

That's awful...that's not how it should be played! You should play with us and see what real soccer is like.

[true_noir]

[She giggled.] The soccer players were never very happy with the afterparties, I assure you.

I might be interested one day. I could put the knives to the side of the field for it. There's a pretty little meadow you might use in one of the floors here.

...just have security. Monsters, after all...

[blockspenguins]

No one should enjoy the afterparties if they're like that.

Yes! I can't wait for you to join us then!

...wait, monsters?

[true_noir]

All over the place. There's these giant mosquito creatures, big as a room. Don't let them near you. If they bite, they'll make you relive your worst memomries.

...it doesn't do anyone any favors for their sanity, I assure you.

[pengeen]

That's not soccer at all.

[Look at how mad Kidou is..]

Don't disgrace the name of soccer like that.

[true_noir]

mmm, you should take it up with the fans in the world I come from. It was... something of a common practice in the larger games.

[pengeen]

...well, your soccer isn't the soccer I play.

[true_noir]

The game was likely the same. The fans? Perhaps not. It involved a ball, no hands and a pair of nets, yes? Lots of kicking, running about and knee-high socks?

[pengeen]

Yes.. I guess it is the same.

Soccer is a big deal where I come from... so the fans can get a bit crazy as well.. but no where near your level...

[true_noir]

Well, to be honest... Europeans had a habit of taking everything too seriously from time to time.

You ... are a friend of the young man, yes?

[No, she's not going to clarify which one she's referring to. She expects it's obvious she's not talking about Luffy.]