animus_network | .†.[ t e x t ] .†. [1] faint melody || backdated

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.†.[ t e x t ] .†. [1] faint melody || backdated

[ because it's difficult for Tear to actually express her emotions properly, she's going to use text instead of a video or audio recording. It at least, will serve as mask for her as she gathers herself back up. ]

It seems my brother, Van has disappeared, leaving nothing behind-- Luke as well.

I have not seen...Natalia either.

[ there's a long pause in text ]

I'll be in the meadows if anyone needs me. [ part of the way she copes. losing comrades and a brother. ] It is truly unfortunate, that were unable to say our proper goodbyes.

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All three are gone. There are stones for them in the graveyard, if you'd like to leave something.

[Asch shows up at the meadow a while later, without any particular words or ceremony. He can't claim any sadness that Van is gone, but if the Tower is anything like a bargain, then what a price to pay.

Ulimately, he settles to a seat on the damp ground near wherever Tear is. Neither of them is much for outward expression, anyway.]

[ The message is unread as Tear has left the computers to make her way to the meadow. She left a report as she's supposed to. It would be right to let others know of the individuals that were no longer in the tower. She will probably return later to read the message and visit their graves, but for now, she sits in plain sight, as she watches the greenery with expressionless eyes. It's pain that she's gone through many times. It's not going to change, no matter how many times it happens.

She doesn't blame Asch for not feeling anything, because Van isn't a good person. He's treated Asch unfairly, and she understands. She can never ask him to feel or share those feelings that she has towards her brother. Tear can't forgive him, but she also can't hate him.

She feels his presence not too long after he enters. She glances briefly at him as he takes a seat next to her. She was never able to speak with Asch properly after their first encounter at the tower. It seems they are rather distant, but it makes sense, since they all have their own things to deal with. Her gaze rests on him for a moment before turning back to the greenery. They are definitely similar on that aspect of being unable to show their outward expressions. ]

[He's gotten better at it, a little. It's a while before he says anything - if Tear looks, she's find him fiddling with some of few flowers trong enough to hold on through this season. They'll be frostkill soon, too, but until then they're growing as best they can.

Not unlike the rest of the Tower, really.]

It feels like the disappearances outweigh the arrivals, now. Maybe we won't have to worry about the clock running down, because we'll all be gone by then.

[It's a dark, pessimistic thought.]

[ She does notice that he's got a few flowers in his hands. Tear, herself, had a few scattered ones in her lap as the silence continued.

It is rare to see them blossom. The Tower itself has always left her feeling uneasy and on her toes. It's the same with the flowers. They feel delicate and fragile in such a place.

She gazes back at him as he said those words. ]

Is it uncommon, to have many leave more than the ones that stay?

[ Her tone was even, but clearly, the thought is there as well. She knows that it's rather dark to think of such things, but Asch does have a point. People come and go, and there's no telling what will happen. ]

Up until the glamour failure, there was a small but steady increase in the population. Since then, the dorms have been slowly emptying.

[Thinking the dark thoughts comes with the territory. He's been here... nearly a year, now. Not as long as some, but even the number who seemed sure to stay, those who had been here longer than he had, is getting smaller and smaller.]

I haven't seen any new names below the second floor in a couple of months.

[ It is unsettling to hear that. Tear hasn't been in the Tower for long, but the words that Asch said made her think. It does seem like the place is getting smaller with people. She's only been here for a few months, so the change might not have affected her as much as someone who has been a veteran for some time. ]

It seems as though they're attempting this on purpose, but for what reason?

[ It was a rhetorical question. She can guess why pretty easily, but it's better not to let her mind wander. From her understanding, they are required to do things in order to return home, so why are her friends and family disappearing when they are here for the same reasons as her? ]

This is rather unsettling.

I can't say whether it's on purpose or not. With what's happened, it might simply be that they can't hold on to us as well as they used to.

[And if they were all lost when the power cores failed, then that would be that. Dead worlds and the madness of loneliness for the rest of eternity.

The thought isn't comforting.]

Perhaps, that is the case.

[ Perhaps, not. The fonist didn't really know what to believe, but losing people was never easy, regardless of the situation. She would have to accept the possibilities. It was still hard to grasp her head around everything, but little by little, she was starting to get it. ]

I am curious to how long they'll hold onto us, Asch.

[He remembers her from the room, her abilities and her general demeanour. There isn't much he can offer as far as familiarity, but there is one thing he can assist with.

She says she'll be at the meadow, and so he appears there later in the day. Later because he went scrounging in the gardens for a good long time to find a forget-me-not.

He clears his throat as he approaches to give her time to prepare for someone's coming, if she's out of sorts. He's not really sure what to expect. His own coming to terms with things was entirely different, he's sure.]

I didn't mean to intrude, but I saw your message. I wanted to speak with you, if that's acceptible.

[ Tear had collected a small handful of flowers that were sitting on her lap. Her eyes seemed distant for a moment, before turning her head when she heard a voice. She had felt the presence before the sound of someone clearing their throats.

She turned to greet him with a brief nod of her head before answering his question, as she shifts her position. ]

Hello, Xehanort.

[ There's little emotions displayed in her words, but rather her eyes. ]

[ There was no smile from her, but she attempted to at least be a bit civil with someone she had met. ]

That is fine. What would you like to speak to me about?

Edited 2013-12-13 17:09 (UTC)

[He hands her the flowers he has, to be added to her bundle, to be used or discarded as she saw fit.]

To lose one is sadness, I can only assume. For that I am sorry.
So long as you hold them in your memory, however, they will never be apart from you.

[ She accepts them, since she'll be handing them to the graves of those she has cherished. ]

Yes, I suppose it is.

[ Her tone seems rather empty, but she understands what he means. There's no point in dwelling on what has happened. There's only time to move on. ]

I can only hope that they are in a much better place, than our destroyed worlds.

[ A wishful thought but their happiness is important to her. ]

Anywhere is better than here, I suppose...

[It's not something he completely agrees with, but most people seem to have this sentiment so he doesn't feel amiss in expressing it.]

I mean it, though. Cherish your memories. You carry those people inside your heart. Being aware of loss is painful, but it could be much worse.

Yes, you are right about that.

[ She nods her head. It is true. She's content with knowing her friends won't have to deal with the Tower. She's fine carrying the burden for them. She is after, a soldier, and that is what she does best. ]

Thank you, Xehanort, I will keep those words in mind. Indeed, there are always things far worse than loss.

[He cocks his head slightly.]

Do you mean that? So many people can say such a thing simply because to them it's a concept far removed.

Yes I do.

[ She replied firmly. ] I do not take words of others lightly.

[ He is honest and when he said those words, thus she has no reason not to follow his advice. ]

It is helpful.

Edited 2013-12-27 10:21 (UTC)

One should always take the words of others with a grain of salt. One never knows what is true and what is not... false belief is how misinformation spreads.

Nevertheless, inasmuch as I can be, I'm sorry for your loss.

It is not the matter of truth or not. Sometime what people say can be uncertain but sometimes it can be rather helpful and honest.

Misinformation is also something that comes from it, but it is not simply limited to just misinformation.

[ The fonist replied with a gentle tone. ]

It is alright. There is no time to remain saddened. It is a matte of time before it is time to continue forward

Why would you wanna say goodbyes?

[Maybe he was being too hopeful, but he didn't want to give up. He didn't want this to be the end.]

This isn't over, we still have work to do, right?

Edited 2013-11-19 05:47 (UTC)

[ it's a good hour or two before she sees the messages on the terminals. ]

Should I have said something else, Jounouchi?

I am aware. I am not giving up, rest assured.

[The response is delayed as well.]

I'm not really sure what should be said.

[But.]

I don't think goodbye is one of them.

I see.

I suppose, it should be something such as 'I hope to see you again?'

It doesn't seem realistic.

[ from what Luke told her, Van was dead, so there was no real reason to go around that. ]

Edited 2013-11-20 22:27 (UTC)

People come and go all the time.

Sometimes they come back. [Or never at all.]

But we're trying to save our worlds aren't we?

Yes, I'm aware.

From what I heard, yes.

That is the goal. I know that I must continue forward for the sake of those I have lost. for now.

Yeah. I know my friends wouldn't want me to give up.

[It was hard sometimes to move forward, but it was all that he could do.]

Yes, I don't intend on giving up any time soon.

[Besides that.] How are you?

I'm fine and yourself.

Not bad. Could be worse.

Yes, it seems like we don't have much of a break here. It's even more complicated with the unpredictable things that continues to happen.

I'm glad to hear you are well, Jounouchi.

I cant afford to be weak in front of others. We have bigger things to worry about. Living here.

Edited 2013-11-27 06:41 (UTC)

No, we cannot. Especially, when there are many who are still in the state of panic and confusion.

You are strong, Jounouchi.

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