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-(Uh)
-(Does +his sor+ of +hing happen)
-(Of+en)

[Conveniently, Equius can use text so that no one can see him FLIPPING THE FUCK OUT even as he types. Unfortunately, he can't hide it from the real world, so anyone walking through the dormitory hallways can witness one very, very jumpy troll clattering into the terminal.]

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[Eridan is not an optimist. Not really. He's the very definition of hopeless.

Then again, you wouldn't know that, would you, Equius. He hopes you never know the things he's done, when reaching hopelessness.

He shrugs.]

We will.

[He gives his voice conviction he doesn't really feel, for the sake of trying to make Equius feel better about this whole affair.]

[No he... really wouldn't. But knowing this tower, how long will it be before The Amazing Adventures of Eridan gets blasted out across the loudspeaker for all to hear?]

[Equius sighs and puts his hands on his hips, and then notices the small fortress of books on the table. Odd. What could Eridan possibly find in the library now that he hasn't before...?]

...What are you reading?

[No, it won't be long. Because otherwise Eridan might approach something close to being comfortable in the tower and that's not allowed. He's cosmically forbidden from having a good day, apparently.

He shrugs.]

Oh just. This and that.

[He's not. Blushing, okay. Not at all.]

Havven't really gotten a chance to read in a wwhile, might as wwell take it, right?

[Don't worry Eridan, at least you can sympathize with... um... wow. There really is no greater punching bag for the universe than Eridan Ampora. This is pretty awkward. --Also, congratulations. You have managed to suck so much that Equius Zahhak has noticed your blushing, and he is now backpedaling as furiously as he can.]

--R-right. Of course.

[If you could kindly not notice the fact he's reading trashy vampire novels, it would be swell.]

Do you read much?

[The question is genuine, though. He's known Equius for a while but. But he's Eridan. He's an expert in being a wallpaper flower and not butting into things unless really necessary. For all he's done for everyone, sometimes it hits him, how little he really knows them.]

[Pfft, he doesn't know the difference between trashy vampire novels and any other kind of vampire novel, or indeed any kind of novel at all.]

[...No, seriously, he doesn't.]

Except for manuals if need be, no, I don't.

[That would be because he's poor as dirt and can't really afford to get any books, but he's not going to mention that in front of a higherblood.]

[This is sad and should be remedied. ~~Eridan has unironically read the troll version of Twilight. No one will convince me otherwise.~~]

Oh.

[He looks over at his pile of books, pensive.]

I used to read a lot. I don't evven remember wwhy I stopped.

[Might have been the undead crawling around his hive. Might have been movies. Might have been just something else entirely.]

[From the size of that pile, Eridan has unironically read the troll version of everything.]

Well... that makes sense.

[He starts to walk towards the pile, abruptly stops and glances up at Eridan, and then continues on once he's confirmed that the jadeblood isn't about to start screaming his head off just for that. Jadebloods are notorious that way. He slides down in a chair across from Eridan and looks closer at the stacks.]

...Would you mind if I borrowed one?

A course not, go ahead.

[Eridan does roll his eyes behind his sunglasses ~~yes, he's enough of a cool kid to read with his sunglasses on~~ but it's more fond than annoyed. Trust Equius to ask permission to use what amounts to a public library.]

It's good to pass the time.

[Hey, maybe it's a good thing that he wears those sunglasses everywhere he goes. Otherwise Equius would actually see all the times that he rolls his eyes at him, and that would just open up a whole other can of awkwardness worms. Keep on coolkidding, Eridan! You're actually Doing It Right for once.]

[That in mind, Equius grabs something from near the top of the pile and flips to a random page. It doesn't take long for his eyebrow to rise. He doesn't know what the hell is wrong with this book, Eridan, but he sure is judging you for picking it out. What is it even called, anyway...]

...'Twilight'?

[It came out a fair bit more amused than he would have liked it to.]

[Eridan looked pointedly in a different direction. Just luck that Equius would pick that one in specific...]

...quotin' Jade. It's fer ironic purposes. It's not like I like it or anythin'.

[Well, if it's for ironic purposes...]

[He doesn't understand a lot about enforced irony, admittedly. Of course, he knows what it is at the most basic level, but has a lot of trouble actually placing and detecting it in real life. Kind of like sarcasm. And every other aspect of social interaction.]

[Twilight only graces his hand for a few more seconds before he frowns and replaces it on the pile from which it came, seeming to stare at it for a moment before turning his head to Eridan.]

...What should I read?

[Eridan gave Equius a surprised look for a moment, before he turned to the books all around them.]

Wwell, wwhat do you like?

...I don't know? You know more about this than I do. [He looks at the pile that has accumulated on the desk.] I meant something that you weren't reading for, uh, ironic purposes. Something that was actually good. ...I-in your opinion.

Oh. Hmm.

[Eridan looks thoughtful for a moment, then seems to brighten up a little.]

Hang on.

[And then he's gone to navigate the library in search of a particular book.]

[Equius raises his eyebrows slightly at the sudden change of mood, but does as he's told and remains seated. Coming as a surprise to no one, he's not making any plans to chase him -- he's just going to wait right here until Eridan finds what he's thinking of and comes back.]

[After a while, Eridan returns with the result of his search, offering it to Equius just a tad shyly.]

It's not my favorite, but. It's one of the best I've read since I got here.

[Enjoy Interview with a Vampire? Oh god, his bias is showing again, isn't it.]

[Equius takes the book and looks down at the front cover. Vampires are a foreign concept to him -- now if it said 'rainbow drinker' then that would be a different story -- but oh well, a lot of books probably had fictional components in them.]

Ah, thanks.

[Stop. Blink. Wait...]

...Er. 'Thank you', I meant.

[Eridan chuckled a little.]

I think, at this point,thanks is more than enough, Eq.

[He shrugs.]

I hope you like it though.

[Cue one baffledquius.]

What does that mean? More than enough?

[Eridan shook his head.]

It means don't worry and go enjoy your book.

...Oh. Alright then.

[He's still as clueless as ever, but hey, after Eridan went to all the trouble of explaining it...]

[He shuffles around the book a bit and glances up at Eridan before standing up.]

Well. I should leave you to your work, then.

[Eridan nods. He wouldn't really mind the company all that much, but he knows better than to put Equius in a tight spot.]

Let me know if you like it, yeah?

I will.

[And then he nods to Eridan and leaves, book in hand. It doesn't take long before his footsteps get heavier and he starts to run.]

[Sigh. Well, at least he didn't really freak him out or terrified him too bad? And hey, if he gets Equius into vampire stuff, it'll be a smashing victory, right?

Time to read some more.]

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...Oh god. This is going to be fantastic.

Isn't it? :3

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