animus_network | [video]

No way! Seriously?

[He has a huge grin on his face.]

Yep! You gotta come see the decorations on the ice cream!

Oh? Did she make a pretty little pattern as well?

[He wonders if it's a pig face or something.]

She did, little pictures of Ganon.

[Even better.]

[This makes him burst out in laughter. It's a minute or two before he can get a good reply going.]

...That's probably the best thing she could put on the ice cream. Really.

Whatever people say about her, she's definitely got some style!

The best style.

So, we got anywhere to store that ice cream?

I went up through some'a the new floors with Shion yesterday. There's a floor with a kitchen and freezer so we can stick 'em there.

[He nods.]

Pretty convenient. You want me to put up a sign or something that keeps people from touching that ice cream?

Oh yeah, that'd be great! It'd suck if someone took his ice cream before we got to give it to him. And I bet Ruana would be pretty upset too.

Just leave it to me then.

[Runic magic used to guard two vats of ice cream. Who said that magecraft didn't have a mundane utility?]

Great! I'm counting on you then, Lancer!

[Another nod.]

Say...speaking about Ganon, has he seen his new decorations yet?

[Meaning: has he thrown a tantrum on the network yet.]

I don't know, he hasn't set anything on fire, flooded anything or gone on a killing spree so I don't think so.

[He pouts, just slightly.]

Does it mean it was a wasted effort then?

Naaah. I remember he never slept a lot back in Hyrule, when he kidnapped me. He brooded a lot. Or he might be so mad that he can't form a sentence.

I bet he'll feel better once he knows we're getting him a birthday present.

[Smirking.]

Oh yeah! He'll definitely feel better then!

Tetra, that's wonderful!~

Let me know what happens when you give it to him, alright?!

I don't think I'll have to. Pretty sure the whole tower will know when he gets it!

I'm glad to hear that!~ If you need any help putting that someplace, let me know, alright?!

I will but I got a place in mind already. There's a floor that has a kitchen and some freezers. I'm gonna put 'em up in there.

Ah, alright then! Just make sure you hide them when you put them in there. It would be terrible is someone ate them before you gave them to him.

Oh yeah, I'll hide it real good. Pirates are good at hiding things!

Well, I suppose you would have to be if you're always burying treasure.

Exactly and I'm the best.

[JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL HE CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS OH GOTT-

Richtofen is bent over the terminal, his head in his folded arm and his shoulders shaking with muffled laughter. His free hand is balled into a fist, and he bangs it regularly against the terminal in a fit of hysterics, which causes him to send an accidental text reply.]

fvggdsdjhjkvbc ddvgbhjgfgvgfggggggggvf

hoy buddy whats that supposed to be

[Laugh as long as you want, Richtofen. Just wait until Ganon actually gets the ice cream! No doubt his rage will be there for public viewing pleasure.]

[Richtofen keeps laughing and banging against the terminal, until eventually the poor abused thing's voice function clicks on. He can be heard laughing hysterically, the keys of the terminal clacking under his fist. The voice feed clicks off again as he first drags his hand over the keyboard, then rests it on top, and another reply is sent.]

nb nkilub,kibjjhnvbbbb

yhjn

bghjfghkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

[That's Tetra laughing now but she calms down quickly.]

Just wait 'til we give it to him! That'll be even better!

[Richtofen lifts his head up, and it's at that point that he realizes he's been sending keysmash over the network. He takes a few shaky breaths to try and compose himself, but all of his exhales come out as giggles. Still trembling with laughter, he tries to type up a proper response.]

I have nor boudt that it will

i can't wait to s ee the look on his face!

O hipe he gets really nagry

Thadt would eb so funny!!!

[He coughs into his fist and wipes away a few tears, then manages to type out something that isn't complete gibberish.]

Well done, child. You've managed to bring some light to this damnable place, at least for a moment.

[There's a pause, and then...]

But do not take that as a compliment!!

[This is a (mostly) technologically incompetant child from a technologically lacking world. So she only understood a bit of that.]

I do what I can to make things a little better. And if it makes Ganondork's life a little worse, bonus points for me~!

[Too late, totally taking it as a compliment. She does what she wants, Richtofen.]

[Even though Richtofen is technically on Ganondorf's side, he can't stop himself from thinking that this is the most amusing thing he's seen in weeks. He's sure he'll get punched across the Tower if he laughs to his face about all this, but it'll be worth it. His fake loyalty only stretches so far.]

Excellent! I will be listening to hear when he starts screaming his pretty little head off about this.

Thank you for the laugh, child. I needed that.

Auf Wiedersehen!

[Then Richtofen abandons the terminal, cackling as he goes.]

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