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[The Cu Chulainn that appears in the feed is a far cry from his normal, cheerful self. His hair looks even more disheveled than it usually is. His eyes have narrowed into slits and vein are popping all over his face. And his spear is out for all to see.]

WHERE IS SHE?

[He screams into the monitor, slamming his fist down on the keyboard and shaking the entire terminal.]

WHERE IS AYAKA SAJYOU? WHICH ONE OF YOU BASTARDS TOOK HER? WHICH ONE OF YOU TOOK MY MASTER?

[He takes a deep breath before he screams again.]

AND WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKERS ERASED HER NAME ON HER DOOR AND MADE HER A GRAVE? GET THE FUCK OVER HERE AND I MIGHT LIMIT MYSELF TO BREAKING YOU IN HALF!

[He knows. He knows that these are usually indicators that people had left the Tower for good. But he doesn't want to admit it. If he does, it means he's failed his Master again...]

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[He sighs and leans against the terminal for support.]

I'll try. If you think I can, then I can't disappoint a friend, can I?

[His voice seems to have some of his old energy back.]

[But at the same time, all he can think of is how it's not a Servant's role to "move on" or "go forward." He had lived his life once to the fullest. Called back into the modern day, he was now a weapon. And now that he has lost his wielder, there was no reason for him to linger.]

I would like you to do your best not to.

[There is something sad in the words no matter now much he might try to hide it. It's not that he expects his roommate to fail, it's just that he has a feeling he knows what the other man is thinking and they are questions he has been searching for the answers to for as long as he's been here.]

I'm sorry. I don't have the answers for you, but you aren't alone in asking the questions. You know I would like the answer to that too. It doesn't seem right. It should be anyone but us.

...You were loyal, at least. You deserved a second chance.

[With the amount of tragedy that he had seen Diarmuid needed a second chance.]

[Diarmuid sighs rubbing at his temples trying to sooth away some of the pain.]

You are loyal. You did what you had to fulfill her last request, didn't you? It might not seem like you did the right thing, but when it comes down to the choice between honor and loyalty it's never an easy one to make. Trust me. I know.

...I turned my spear at her. Because when I made my contract with Ayaka, she wasn't completely dead.

[He wishes he could stop this, but the rage won't stop clawing at him. Now that he's lost an outside source to direct it at, it has turned inward at himself.]

[Diarmuid tilts his head, confusion in his eyes. He wants to know what exactly happened with his roommate and his first master, but at the same time, he's afraid of upsetting him again.]

Will you tell me about it, please? You have mentioned bits and pieces, but not enough for me know what to say to help you.

[For a minute, he considers just brushing the request off. But Diarmuid already knows that he failed. He might as well as tell Diarmuid how much of a failure he is. When he speaks, his voice is eerily calm.]

She was cursed by her father to die unless she won the Holy Grail. I was supposed to save her and take it for her, but I dawdled in killing the other Servants. Eventually her curse consumed her and she asked me to kill her. But I...couldn't even do that right.

[He had tried to save her with his runes, but to no avail.]

She died. And the curse didn't let her rest in peace. It turned her into a zombie thing. So I went to the only Master willing to take me and told her I would help her with her matters...if she could give me the prana to kill Misaya for good.

[He shuts up and waits for Diarmuid's reaction.]

[Diarmuid is quiet for several moments taking it all in. He'd known things had been bad, but...

That was just horrible. Who would do such a thing to their child?

When he speaks, his voice is calm, though there is something barely controlled and angry in its tone. However, none of it is directed at his roommate. What he is angry with is Fate for putting his roommate in such a situation.]

Were you able to keep your promise after that? Did you help her find peace after you took your new master?

Yes, I did that. I swore loyalty, and then I killed her.

[He stares at Diarmuid.]

Are you ashamed now? That such a Servant, such a traitor, would call you his friend?

[Diarmuid returns the stare, his gaze serious, though his voice is soft.]

I have never and will never be ashamed to call you my friend, Cu Chulainn. You kept your vow. That is all that is important here.

[Diarmuid suddenly realizes just how right his earlier comment about choosing between honor and loyalty is.]

Honor and loyalty are both important. Those two things are what I based my life around, but because of that I know acutely that Fate likes to make you choose between things that are that important to you. Sometimes you have to be dishonorable to stay loyal or be disloyal to be honorable. Neither is an easy choice to make.

[His gaze finally softens to match his voice.]

I am sorry you had to make that chose in such a terrible way...

...

[Even as he tries to fight it, his lip quivers, and he starts crying again. He turns around and covers his eyes so Diarmuid won't have to see his tears.]

Thank you.

[Even if he might not deserve Diarmuid's friendship, there is no way he would disregard it.]

But loyalty and honor...I don't know if I have either at the moment.

[For the sake of loyalty, he had dragged his honor through the mud. He had let his Noble Phantasm be sealed away. He had allowed his Master to use him in a humiliating manner. And in the end, he had killed his Master anyways. Not only that, but the tragedy had repeated and he had lost Ayaka too.]

[Diarmuid steps forward and puts a hand on his roommate's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze.]

Don't hide your tears from me. I won't judge you for them. You have seen me shed enough to know that.

You know, I don't know that I feel I have honor or loyalty now either, but we can't let that stop us. We have to keep moving forward so that we can one day reclaim those things that Fate has taken from us. Those we have lost deserve it and, more importantly, we deserve it.

[He nods.]

Fate took those things from you.

[He turns back to Diarmuid.]

But do you really think I can try too? This was...already my second time.

Fate took them from us both.

[His voice is very stern for those words, but the sternness soon fades.]

You shouldn't have been put into that situation. Does that sound familiar to you? It's as true for you as it was for me.

And this is my third chance, not my second. Even so, I have no intention of letting numbers stop me from trying. I would certainly hope you feel the same way.

Help me with that, alright?

[He tries to look cheerful, but his expression comes off as childish and unsure.]

Let's both go for the third time together?

[Diarmuid smiles at him and the smile actually manages to reach his eyes.]

Of course. After all, someone has to keep you out of trouble and on task.

And someone has to keep you from getting in over your head.

[He can't quite tell Diarmuid that counting Scathach, this is already his fourth chance. He kept on getting chances...and he kept on wasting them.]

[Even if the conversation might be done, he makes no move to leave the area of the terminal. Or rather, he makes no move to part from Diarmuid. Now, more than ever, he wants something that won't disappear once he turns around.]

[Of course, this mood probably won't last for long. Once he gets his energy back, he'll probably run off somewhere to vent.]

I'm not going to argue for once. This place likes to let me get in over my head far too easily. I need someone to help me out with that.

[Diarmuid reaches out and gives his roommate's arm a gentle squeeze. He recognizes that desperation from earlier in the week when they had died. All things considered, he's not too surprised to see it resurface after something like this, so he is perfectly willing to stand there just as long as his roommate needs him to.]

[Lancer gives his friend a grateful smile.]

H-hey...you wanna get back in our room or something? Afraid I've kinda...made a mess here.

[And he's pretty sure that he'll make a bigger mess of some other place, sooner or later.]

I don't mind, at all. I actually thought about suggesting it, but I didn't know if it would help or not.

[He smiles as a thought crosses his mind.]

I still have some of the cookies that Mami made me. Why don't we have some? Things like that, they use them as comfort foods, right? I think we both could use some comfort right now.

[Granted, his roommate can use it more than he can, but Diarmuid's head is still aching itself from all that raw emotion.]

[To tell the truth, he'd prefer to drown his sorrows, but who was he to say no to cookies?]

Yeah, we can have some. Who's this Mami girl? Get a new girlfriend this time?

[He seems to be back up to form...]

[Diarmuid reaches out and gives his roommate's hair a ruffle before pushing him in the direction of their room.]

She's my friend. Friend! Actually, she's kind of like an adoptive daughter to me.

[He sighs and then laughs.]

I must really miss my family. Come on you, lets get some cookies.

[He laughs and starts walking.]

And here you were accusing me of collecting girls that age.

...So care to introduce me to your daughter sometime?

[This is a smile that promises only naughty things.]

[Diarmuid gives him a wary, but amused look out of the corner of his eye.]

Only if you promise to behave. We were talking about having a tea party when things settled down. Maybe you could come?

[He raises an eyebrow.]

Tea isn't really my thing.

[It reminded him a great deal of Saber and all.]

...And your invitation is a little late. She would have appreciated it more.

[He sighs.]

But what the hell. If you're the one inviting me, I'll try to come.

[~~Blame Ganon if he ends up being a no-show.~~]

Re: [Action]

oathshackledbird - 2013-03-03 20:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: [Action]

puppy_lancer - 2013-03-03 21:09 (UTC) - Expand

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