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I know what happened. Are you happy with yourselves? Doing things when you don't even know what you're doing, or why. Look what you did... there were people suffering, children crying. Do you know how much pain you caused? It isn't right. It isn't fair.

What gives you the right? You take other people's lives in your hands! Take their choices from them. Deciding whether we should live or die for us. Do you think that we want to die? I don't. While there's life, there still hope. We should keep on living, no matter what. We should always keep--

[After this brief speech, Kariya slumps, breathing heavily. His good eye widens, and the swollen veins in his face seem to pulse for a moment. The effort of speaking has obviously taken a lot out of him. The physical and mental shock of the worms returning has taken its toll on him. He looks as if he's having trouble standing upright at the terminal. A spasm of pain crosses his face. When he speaks again, his voice is weaker.]

I need a healer--is there someone who can help?

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[ Cecil simply nods. She's still not sure what to make of Kariya, but she doesn't want him to suffer more than he does already. ]

I'll come to you. I think it may be best if I heal you inside your room though where you can rest afterwards.

[ She remembers healing him very clearly because she's never caused more pain through healing before. It was frightening, and though now she knows that as long as she doesn't use Esuna on him, he should be all right, she's still a little nervous. ]

I'm near my room now.

[Having tired himself out by arguing, he doesn't have a lot more to say. He smiles at her weakly.]

I'll go there. It's 2-10. You can find me there.

[ Cecil nods and gives Kariya a reassuring smile of her own, hers stronger and more confident, before she cuts the terminal feed and begins to quickly make her way to the second floor. She takes the stairs two at a time and when she arrives at Kariya's door, she knocks lightly. ]

Kariya? It's Cecil.

[He's sitting on his bed, staring down at a photo in his hands. He's taken a number of photos here, but this one is still the most special to him: the picture of himself with Aoi, Rin, and Sakura. It's not the real photo, he knows, now, but the image it shows him is the same, so that doesn't matter. What matters is the people in the picture: his family.

He looks up as Cecil knocks.]

Come in.

[ When she hears Kariya grant her admittance, Cecil pushes open the door gently and peers inside for a moment before entering further into the room. She's a little surprised to find Lancelot isn't here with his Master. He seemed rather close to him the last time she saw them. ]

How are you feeling?

I'm--

[He's about to say he's fine, as he usually does, but he sighs, instead, looking down and giving an honest answer, for once, the frustration and pain evident in his voice.]

I'm not doing well at all. It hurts, everywhere. They're killing me, and I can't do anything to stop it. But they're not even real. Why did they give them to me? I don't understand. Why?

[ Cecil takes another step closer to Kariya, her eyebrows raised in surprise. "They"? Killing him? What is he talking about? ]

I don't understand. Who is? Who's not real?

[ The paladin doesn't entirely understand what the man's physical ailments are, but the last time she saw Kariya, Lancelot spoke about his familiars-- worms implanted directly in his body. They caused him increased pain because of her healing magic. She doesn't know the exact details of their nature, but she has to wonder if that's what he means. ]

Is it your that are familiars hurting you?

[Kariya tries not to cry. He used to cry, when his training started, but it never helped. It only made things worse, or earned him derision. He's near tears now, but he doesn't let any fall. He nods.]

Yes. They're parasites. They're not mine at all. They're my father's. He put them inside me. I hate them. [It's can be hard for him to talk, especially to say a lot at once when he's so exhausted, but his anger gives him the energy. Now that he's started talking, he can't seem to stop, the bitterness pouring out of him.] I hate him. He did this to me, his own son, and he thought it was funny! He just--wants to watch me suffer and die.

[His voice rises, his veins twitch, and he has to take deep breaths to calm down. His hatred of Zouken isn't easy to suppress, but he tries.]

But the worms aren't really here. When the--glamour, if that's what it's called--failed, they were gone. I was healthy again. So I know now that they're only an illusion. But they feel so real. [He presses a hand to his chest, and it aches.]

Your father...?

[ Cecil echoes dumbly, stunned by his explanation. How could a parent do something so cruel to his own child? The truth horrifies her, but more than that, his suffering resonates with her. The white knight gently lays a hand on his shoulder in an effort to be comforting, her mouth pulled down in a tight frown.

It makes sense. The parasitic worms are not naturally a part of Kariya's physical body and they aren't a part of his soul. Of course they, like everything else that's supposedly theirs here, are only a construct of the Tower's powers. They don't actually exist in the same sense as their souls do or the metal and film and fluid that makes up everything else. ]

I'm sorry.

[ Her voice is quiet in stark contrast to Kariya's. After a moment's hesitation, she sits down beside him on the bed (she can't help wondering how they're really managing this, since the beds are actually pods, but she doesn't dwell on the thought). ]

One matter at a time. I admit I don't quite understand how our powers and handicaps really work, considering all of it is false, but if our souls believe them to be real, then we must treat this as we normally would. I will do what I can for the damage they have already done today, but...

[ Cecil hesitates again, glancing away from Kariya in a bit of shame. ]

I will ask no more if you would prefer me not to. You have no reason to trust me with such private information.

[ This is especially true in light of her lack of absolute trust in both him and his Servant. ]

But... is there any way to... "remove" them?

Yes, he-- [Kariya doesn't often talk about Zouken, but the return of the pain so suddenly that it feels tenfold has weakened his resolve. Yet some of the strength seems to go out of him, his anger fading into resignation.] He's done cruel things to me since I was a child. It's the way things have always been. I tried to get away from him, but it didn't work. I had to come back.

[Zouken is still with him here.]

I don't understand either, but yes, when the illusions are on, it's like the worms are really here. I can see them and feel them.

I--I'd do anything I could to remove them... [He doesn't have any reason to be suspicious of her, for his part.] Anything.

But I don't know. It could kill me. But I'd like to try anyway. It would be worth the risk.

[ Cecil holds her breath for a moment-- an attempt to keep herself from repeating again and again how sorry she is that he's had to suffer this. She keeps quiet as he talks of his father, leaving her hand on his shoulder.

They may have had an uncomfortable first meeting, but she wants to help him. ]

...Why? Why did he put them in your body? What do they do exactly?

[Kariya sighs.]

I shouldn't only blame him. It was my choice.

I left my family when I was young, because they were cruel and inhuman. But--then my father adopted a little girl, the daughter of my best friend, and...

...I knew what that would mean for her. I knew what they'd do to her. So I had to come back, to help her. I couldn't let her be alone, without someone who loved her--!

[Kariya's voice breaks.]

I--you might know about the Grail War. I decided to fight in it, with the condition that if I won, my father would let her go, would let her be free. But I'd never trained as a magus. The only way I could be strong enough was to... To take on the worms. They augment my Magic Circuits, make me stronger as a magus.

[Even as they kill him, but that's so obvious, it's probably not worth mentioning.]

[ The Grail War? He must mean the reason Servants and Masters exist. ]

Diarmuid was the one who briefly explained to me about what he is. We did not discuss this war though. Lord-- Waver... and I spoke about the mechanics of magic and magic users as they differ on our worlds. As I understand it, your Magic Circuits are somewhat akin to my mana pool and my spirit and intellect attributes.

[ The rest... Well, it's not a story that's like what she expected. She's not sure what she did expect, really, but it certainly wasn't something like this. She supposes her ignorance of their world as well as judgements she didn't really have a right to make in the first place are to blame for the surprising nature of Kariya's situation. Cecil realizes she was wrong. ]

Do they have an element associated with them? Fire, water...?

[ She takes a breath and shakes her head a little. Where to even begin with this? ]

They reacted to my magic when I used it on you. On my world, only creatures of darkness or the undead would react that strongly to healing spells.

Yes, Diarmuid's a Servant. Lancelot's one, too. I don't think he has to be a Servant here, but I can't convince him not to be. [It's clear that Lancelot likes having someone to serve, to be loyal to.] Masters summon Servants to fight for the Grail. It's like a tournament, with heroes fighting each other. The winner of the Grail gets a wish. But I wasn't going to make a wish, I only wanted Sakura to be free.

That sounds right. I'm not a very good magus, myself. That's why I needed the worms, in order to be strong enough to fight in the War.

Yes, they have an element. Matou magecraft's affinity is for Water.

[He pauses, frowns.]

I don't think they like healing magic, because when you heal me, it hurts them. I'm not exactly sure how the magecraft of our world and yours compare, but you could say they're dark or undead. They're terrible things. I don't know much about how they're made. He didn't teach me about that.

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