animus_network | breath two

But wait! There's more! See this desk here? [He bangs his fist on the table the computer terminal is resting on.] And your chair? My chair? That book over there? [He points at a shelf across the room.]

Basically everything in this tower? All fake. None of it's real. All the stuff that came with us from home? Fake. My Pokémon? Definitely fake. The clothes you're wearing? Also fake! Oh and the food you've been eating this entire time?

Nutrition bars.

[Can you hear the tone in his voice that clearly says "I have no fucks left to give"? Because guess how many fucks John has left. He clearly ain't even bothered by this.]

[It's only when John starts rambling does John have to sit back and wonder if he's lost his sanity finally. Everything? Every single thing in this godforsaken tower? Fake? Having the most basic type of body design known to a video gamer AND everything is fake.

Wow their lives suck. They just fucking suck.

Taking this all in is hard, and it's like a sucker punch when he mentions that their food is nutrition bars.]

This is more fucked up than I thought.

Yup! Basically. It's all been one big illusion, my friend. We shorted the power on the first and it knocked out the glamour system. Fortunately there seems to have been a backup generator of some kind. Because believe me, it was kind of hard to tell everybody apart when it was down. We were all basically a bunch of human glowsticks.

[There's something important in his wording there that he didn't necessarily mean to say. But when you're basically talking to yourself, sometimes the truth slips out.]

According to Ruana, that generator will last for a year. And once it's out? That's it, game over. But personally, I think she's full of shit.

[It's okay, if John really wants to fully confide in John about that. His shoulder is always open bro. But for right now all he can imagine is those wire frames, and how everyone looked like that. He's kind of glad he missed it. He didn't have to see it for himself.]

So we have a year left then our sorry asses are done for? Ha. That would be something an admin would say anyways- right?

Well... it's more like, she might be right about how long the generator will last. I mean it's just a backup so it's not going to last forever. The part I think she's wrong about is the part where she claims that we're all basically going to die horribly.

We can do better than that.

[John shakes his head.]

Not only are we going to do better than that, most of us are just way to hardheaded to die like that. So I agree. She's wrong on that.

So yeah, to make a long story short, that's what you missed. Questions? Comments? Concerns? Err...actually, concerns probably goes without saying. Any concerns you would like to voice so that I can try and help you with them?

[Sorry it was kinda brief, bro. He didn't see any point in dragging this shit out.]

I guess my only concern was how is everyone handling it? I mean I'm sure figuring out you're a bigger fake than you originally thought comes with some kind of shock factor.

But other than that, I think I'm alright? I mean I knew this place was fucked up. So I guess it's not a huge shocker that we're just remnants of Super Smash Brothers.

[You're a good dude. You know yourself well.]

It... depends on the person. You're right, it was a pretty big shock for some people and predictably not everyone took the news well.

We aren't fake though, dude. Our souls are still real. We're still us. [He nudges John in the chest, where he's assuming his soul is. Somewhere in the solar plexus area.]

The only thing that's not real is the fleshy candy coating.

I guess I wish I would have been here. Not that I really would have been able to help. But damn hearing the news afterwards almost seems worse.

[Whoa. Is John getting sappy on him? He is. But they're each other. He would do the same in this situation.] So do you think when we leave we'll have to split ways? I mean. You have Johto to go back to. I don't think whatever happened to have us both here will apply in Johto.

I don't know what's going to happen. But I think I have at least come to accept the fact that they weren't lying about our worlds being destroyed. [His smile fades a little.]

So... technically right now I don't have Johto to go back to. But... I don't think we will necessarily have to split ways, no. Best case scenario: we find a way to revive all our worlds. And if that's the case, I don't see what's to stop us from picking and choosing where we go from here. You could come with me to Johto if you wanted, that would be pretty cool. Though it would mean giving up your powers, but I think it's worth it personally.

[He wants to bring everyone to Johto with him. Can he do that?]

Slightly less good, but still acceptable scenario is that we manage to overthrow Ruana and the other admins but we're have to find a new world to go to from here. Which... as much as I miss Johto, and want to go back I think I would be okay with that. I have met a lot of amazing people here, despite the circumstances. And there's just something about going through this sort of experience together that makes the idea of saying goodbye harder than if things were normal. It's probably selfish to think that though, but I don't know that I want to say goodbye to people just yet or even in a year. Which is weird for me...

[He's nothing, if not used to people leaving by now. It happened all the time in Johto. But something about this is different. In Johto, he never got the chance to say goodbye. And that held true here sometimes as well.]

[Somehow the thought of actually having that opportunity is worse than not. And it baffles him, because it doesn't make sense.]

[John kind of retreats in his physical disposition. His shoulders hunch up again and he's frowning. All indications that this is not the way he wanted this conversation to go.

But he saw it. He saw his world. It was destroyed. It was solitude he didn't want. It was closed in. Nothing was there except remnants of what he used to know. So maybe that wasn't all a dream and he actually did go back there for that month. He thinks it may be time to also some to terms with their current situation. They're wire frames and their worlds are fucking gone.]

Worst case scenario is that we don't make it out alive. But we aren't going to think negatively right now. Truth be told that reality actually calls for us thinking about all of the options that are laid out before us whether they be good or bad. But dying isn't really a thing that I think any of us are going to let happen willingly. Fuck that. Provided our worlds are savable, and I had my choice. I would come to Johto, I think. If having two of us isn't against any of the major scientific laws. Who the fuck needs logic anyways.

[It isn't against anything in SBURB or here in the Tower. Why can't they live happy lives as duplicates there in Johto as well?]

I don't think I would want to say goodbye. Listen dude. I'm not really into being sappy and over dramatic most of the time. But saying goodbye to the people I've met here is almost worse than dying. When you're stuck in a tower that literally does nothing but mutate you and have a constant death threat over your head- yeah I guess you get a little bit fond of the people here. It's weird for me too in that light. I don't usually have this problem.

[He's not used to people coming and going as much as his alternate self is. But when you go from feeling alone, to feeling surrounded. The thought of being alone again kind of messes with you.]

The thought of leaving the tower and still having you, Rose, and Dave that came from Johto is a good thought. [Likewise with his own Dave, and Bro! He wants everyone to come out of this.]

[He has to stop his thoughts from spilling out any further, so he projects some humor into this as well.]

Haha, I'm almost inclined to apologize for meeting myself under such shitty circumstances.

Edited 2013-06-12 08:25 (UTC)

[John closes his eyes and shakes his head, opening them once more once his head comes to a stop.]

Two things. One: don't apologize, that's just silly. It sucks that these are the circumstances we had to meet under but hey, that's just how things go sometimes. We can roll with this. And two... now this one is the most important, so listen good because if I have to say it again after this, I am going to punch you.

[He locks his eyes onto John's, his face fixed in an almost uncharacteristically stern look. That's how serious this conversation is, tall John. This is some serious shit here, listen up.]

Worst case scenario isn't even on the table. It's not even a thing, so just put it out of your mind entirely. This isn't just a sense of idealism talking here, or a denial of the full scope of the situation. It's just the fucking truth. Ruana isn't going to have her way, we've all come too far and done too much for it to just end the way she wants it to. I'll be damned if I left all the work my friends have put into turning this shitty situation around be for nothing when it's all said and done. Even thinking that death is an option is an insult to all the hard work that people way stronger and smarter and braver than us have put into this. This?!

[Unfortunately, he's kind of worked himself into a mini-fit here. The look in his eyes has gone from stern to almost blazingly angry. He grabs the collar of his shirt in both hands, pulling it down to reveal another series of word cuts across his chest, just below his collarbone:]

[EVERYONE WILL LIVE IN THE TOWER FOREVER.]

This isn't going to happen, John. And dying here? Dying here as just as bad as living here forever. Because either way? Nobody will ever be able to move forward ever again.

[Stop him before he keeps going and can't be calmed down for like five minutes... We really don't need a full-blown Egbertian fit right now.]

[John isn't sure what he was expecting here. It started out pretty calm. But as soon as he mentioned something about dying, his alternate self performed the fastest change in demeanor he had seen in his short life. He guesses it was warranted. From the look of it they were from two separate time periods all together- and he remembers. Before the game he had this endless amount of optimism. Not that it was necessarily crushed beyond repair. But it's hard ot be optimistic when you're stuck on a ship with your ecto-sister and a bird version of your best friend. Not that he would ever forget Nannasprite as well. Needless to say cabin fever set in.

But he can't think about such trivial things right now. The way his alternate self is looking at him reads in an almost unnatural way. He goes to speak up, and decides against it. No he needs to shut his big trap and listen right now. Little John is right. Ruana isn't going to have her way, all the hard work everyone has put into this.

John recoils again, he didn't expect that. Those were definitely a set of daunting words, etched right into the other's skin. He assumes this is from the same mistake the arm scars came from.]

There has to be something beyond here. I get what you're saying man.

["Everyone will live in the tower forever".]

You really know how to leave a guy near speechless. I wasn't expecting all that. But I swear, on everything that we were riding on back home. If I ever mention anything about dying, or show any sense of not believe what you just told me. You have full permission to flying jump kick me in the face.

I have your back man. [He thinks about that for a moment. Of course John knows he has his back!] Correction. I have everyone's backs. We all have one common goal right now.

Edited (hurrdurr) 2013-06-13 03:05 (UTC)

[And those seem to be the magic words. Or at least enough to get John down from his half-frenzied state. He takes a deep breath, letting go of the collar of his shirt which he suddenly realizes was probably a bit overdramatic on his part. Whoops. What came over him?]

[He'd ended up saying a hell of a lot more than he had initially planned. Maybe it was the fact that he heard such an un-optimistic option come from his own mouth. Hearing his other self acknowledge something that he himself refused to had struck a nerve somewhere deep inside John, something that really and truly sort of bothered him. Sure, the two of them had two years worth of different experiences... but was such a short time really enough time to make such radical changes? At least when it came to looking on the bright side?]

[It was jarring, being suddenly faced with something like this when up until now, everything had pointed to the two of them being more alike than not. Sure, his other self was slightly more grumpy but he spent two years in SBURB, bored on a ship with little company; versus two years in Johto, surrounded my people near constantly. Who WOULDN'T be a little bit grumpy after something like that?]

Yeah. There's something else out there. I don't know what it is or where it is but... we'll find it. Hehe... but you know I'm going to hold you to that, right? Jump kicking you in the face? I can probably do it at this point too, you know, I had a ninja giving me fighting lessons for a while.

[Sure they never really moved to the advanced fighting techniques before Itachi disappeared, they'd mostly worked on honing John's focus... but his alt self doesn't need to know that. Just let him believe what he wants to believe and ignore the fact that both of them probably know that NEITHER of them are flexible enough to accomplish something like that without the aid of the Breeze. Which... John doesn't have but whatever. A kid can dream.]

Though uh... for the record? I didn't write this. [He gestures vaguely to his chest, where the scars lay beneath his t-shirt.] I actually wrote the exact opposite but I guess the Tower didn't like it. It did that to my first correction too. Not the cake one that one was the last one I did. I didn't dare try it again after that... [He had just really had a bad feeling about it.]

[John finds it really amusing that the two of them can feed off of each other in a situation like this. A passing thought. But do double perhaps work in the same way twins do? As soon as Pokemon John is calm again, his own demeanor is relaxed.]

[He hates that the two of them are the same, yet so different. He guesses experiences do have a lot to do with that. It's not that John couldn't look on the bright side, he could! He often did! Just sometimes a kick to the motivation like this wasn't good for him. He hates to admit that he might have actually gained a little negativity from his experiences back home. Bluh. He didn't want to think about that. He didn't want to think he had actually changed this drastically. But looking at yourself with a different set of experiences screaming optimism is a little jarring.]

Oh please. You're probably too short. But don't worry. I'll bend down to your height. [He snickers. He teases John because it's always fun to make fun of yourself.

Dream on, little John.]

I believe you. But that is a reminder, dude. A reminder of what isn't going to happen and what we're going to prove wrong. [There it is. A shred of optimism!] Dying permanently isn't on my list. Hah.

Wow, escuse you. You should know better than anybody that I'm still growing. I don't know why you hit your growth spurt before I did...maybe there's something weird in Johto's water but I won't always be shorter than you! [Huff puff.]

But yeah, no it's definitely not on mine either. I've crossed temporary dying off now too. Eight times was more than enough for me, thanks. [A beat.] Haha, Vriska would probably approve, yeah?

[John gives off an amused look, before actually breaking out into a little chuckle. Their body language changing once again he sees. Both of them seemed to be relatively calm again.]

Dude, you know I was just teasing right? Or did you forget that I'm actually pretty offensive. [Yes, John does know he can be a little shit. But mooooost of the time he does it without meaning to.]

She would approooooooove of your death count I think. [Yeah, he really just did that. Don't judge.]

breath two | text

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject