[Video/Action] Bittersweet the Bonds of the Heart

[oathshackledbird]

[Losing Mami, who he viewed as an adopted daughter, last month had been hard, but Diarmuid had worked his way through his grief by focusing on the happy times they had spent together.  However, when three more people he is close to are sent home--two of which he cares for like his own children--those happy memories become a source of pain instead of a route passed the grief.

When he appears on the Network, Diarmuid looks more lost and empty than he has in a long time.]

Usually, when I address everyone, I am asking for help on a project that will benefit the whole Tower.  Today, I am asking for help on a more personal level.

How does one handle losing a child?  Not just one, but several over a short period of time?  Nothing I try seems to work, and I am...

[His voice trails off here, shaking and uncertain.  A short time later, the feed ends.]

Action:

[After making his post, Diarmuid can be found wandering the Tower almost as if he hopes one of the floors might give him the answers he seeks.  There are some specific prompts below, but feel free to find him elsewhere.]

Room 4-16:

[A handmade wooden box sits on the bed next to Diarmuid.  Once it held chocolates, now it holds letters.  Several written in a childish hand are sitting on the top, but what Diarmuid is looking at is a pair of drawings that are usually set up near his bed on the nightstand.

He's not crying...  He's not...]

Floor 48 (The Graveyard):

[Rabbit would probably scold Diarmuid for singing what is suppose to be a funny song in such a sad voice, but it's hard to be happy when he is singing the song alone to the gravestone of the person who was suppose to be singing it with him.  He and Yotsuba had promised to get together to sing Rabbit's songs as a way of honoring their friend's memory...

Now that is never going to happen in any way other than this.]

Floor 3 (The Library):

[There is ink smudged on his cheek and his arm, but Diarmuid doesn't notice.  On the surface, he's focused on printing more copies of the Tower Guide to put out for those who might want them, but really he's in the Library for a very different reason.  Tohko was always here and it's like he feels spending time here will help him find her again--find that cheerful voice who had so often redirected him when he didn't know what to do next.  He almost expects to look up and see her there, smiling and ready to offer her help with what he's working on.

Unfortunately, no matter how long he waits, that will not happen.]

Floor 28 (The Music Room):

[Before even his brother, Labrys had been the first family Diarmuid had in this place.  Their bond created during the January experiment, afterward they had talked about learning to play an instrument together, but life in the Tower and his indecisiveness had kept them from doing so.  Now, as his hands run over the piano he had once heard her picking a tune out on, the sound of his grief blocks any music the instrument might make.

How is it that one who once lived his life with no regrets has so many of them now?]

Comments

[crouching_sin]

Heh. There are some here - especially those who would call what has happened to me 'just' - that I cannot stand as well.

[Anyone who can't see the reality is an idiot, after all.]

[oathshackledbird]

All stories have more than one side. Just because one side is considered 'just' over another doesn't make it right. That view is too black and white. I should know. It is the view I had when I arrived here. I have since learned just how wrong it was.

[Diarmuid shakes his head for a moment, his thoughts drifting to his own past and how Fionn had refused to accept the real reason he had run with Grainne. Considering how great a hero Fionn was, Diarmuid often finds it amazing his side of the story survived to be passed through the ages.

He should probably thank Oisin for that if he ever meets him again.]

All battles have winners and losers. All stories have a hero and a villain, but who is who depends on who you ask and what view you take.

[crouching_sin]

Heh. Exactly. Though I'm quite comfortable being cast as the villain... or at least, I'm very used to the role. There's at least one school of belief that sees me on par with the ultimate evil.

[He's not entirely sure how they came up with that one.]

[oathshackledbird]

[And some people think Diarmuid is perfect. He'd love to know how they came up with that one.]

But if given the chance, you would prefer not to be the villain, right?

[Diarmuid seems genuinely curious about Naoya's answer.]

I, mean, after all you took the time to talk to me, and from what I can tell you have been honest and fair with the information you have given me. Those things don't strike me as the actions of one who wants to be the villain.

[crouching_sin]

I've been playing the role of the villain for thousands of years. I don't really much care what other people think of my actions anymore. Should they think I'm doing the right thing, that's nice, but I've dealt with being vilified often enough that it simply doesn't matter much to me anymore.

[Though that's not entirely true, it's true enough.]

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid shuts his eyes for a moment, shaking his head.]

It is a shame you have had to do that. No one should have to do that. They should be judged on who they are now, not who they were in the past.

It might not be worth much, but I, for one, do not see you as a villain. You have given me no reason, and I am very grateful you have taken this time to speak with me and answer my questions.

[crouching_sin]

Heh. It's appreciated. Thanks.

[oathshackledbird]

You are welcome.

[Diarmuid smiles.]

Shall I allow you to return to whatever you were working on before you decided to save me from drowning in my sorrow? I feel better now. The danger comes in letting myself become too wrapped up in my emotions. If I can distract myself a little while my mind processes things, that helps.

It seems your advice was spot on.

[crouching_sin]

Heh. All right. Enjoy whatever you're going to do next.

[He rises from the chair, grinning a bit.]

[oathshackledbird]

I don't know if 'enjoy' is quite the right word right now, but I will try my best.

[He bows his head toward Naoya.]

Be well.