1 ✘ voice

[toomanly]

Something tells me that my world’s not actually been destroyed. Because my world? It’s pretty destructo-proof. We’ve proven that. A couple times, actually. We’re like cockroaches, cut off our heads and we come right back. And some letter saying that you saved me from the big bad--

[ a beat ] Hold on. Who are you supposed to be, anyway? You and your little letter with your little words. Because if you’re not Buffy then i’ve gotta wonder if you’re trying to be her and i’m not sure she’s ever been too big on imitation or flattery being the highest art of anything.

And anyway, if my world had been destroyed, you would’ve saved Buffy, not me. Probably Will, too. I’m not usually the guy that gets picked for these sort of things -- it’s like how I always picked last for dodgeball and put on the bench. I’d probably get picked last for who gets to live in the brand new world order, too.

So, uh, you maybe wanna tell me what’s actually going on? ‘Cause the fake letter really isn’t gonna cut it.

Comments

[guiltapalooza]

It's okay. We'll figure this out.

We'll figure it out and we'll all be friends, and it'll be hunky-dory, and all we'll have to worry about is not getting maimed by the tower monsters. You don't have to be so defensive, okay? [Even though she is...] I'm not going to let someone else's opinion turn me away from you.

[wwaterboy]

okay yeah
but hes your moirail so if he doesnt like me it could be a problem
but ill make him like me if i can wwill
i wwouldnt mind bein his friend if hell havve me

[guiltapalooza]

There won't be a problem, Xander's just surprised. I told you that I didn't think I'd ever, you know, with a man again, remember? And he was there through Tara and everything, so... It's a lot for him to take in.

But he wouldn't be my bestest forever bud if he didn't just want me to happy, which he does, and I am! So you don't need to worry about it, I promise.

[wwaterboy]

yeah i remember
and i might havve possibly assumed hed havve an issue wwhat wwith me not bein human and bein a sea dwwelling troll and all

[guiltapalooza]

He might, but he'll get used to it. He said so himself.

... And if Feferi ever shows up, we'll figure that out, too. Because I would really like to meet her, the one that's yours.

[wwaterboy]

wwell hes just gonna havve to because im not givvin you up wwithout a fight
youre wway too wwonderful

fef wwill lovve you i guarantee it

[guiltapalooza]

No fighting necessary! I'm already yours, you goof. Nothing to give up.

I hope so. She's really important to you, so I want to get to know her. I want to share the important things with you.

[wwaterboy]

i didnt mean actual fighting!

i knoww so
and im glad that your moirail is here
because you need him and i wwant to share those things wwith you too

[guiltapalooza]

I know that! Sorry, I think text is not really the medium for me. I was trying to be reassuring.

See, so, it'll all be fine. You're so worth any problems that come up. Because I do need Xander, but I need you, too.

[wwaterboy]

right so evverythins fine and all is wwell for once

[guiltapalooza]

And you really think that, right? Not just saying that to make me happy?

[wwaterboy]

yeah i do!

[guiltapalooza]

Good. Cause I don't want you to worry about us. Any part of... us.

[wwaterboy]

i dont wwant you to wworry either

[guiltapalooza]

You're the one thing I'm not worrying about.

[wwaterboy]

if thats true then im glad a it

[guiltapalooza]

It's absolutely true. 110%.

You've never given me anything to worry about, Eridan.