1st Sand Coffin [Video/Action]

[fifth_kazekage]

[Gaara has read the letters, and thinks this is just another sadistic experiment at the facility. He gets up out of bed and curiously looks around the room, making a mental note of the trunk. Where is the communication device? It might have been misplaced during the transfer. He needs to find a way to access the public network.

He leaves the room and walks swiftly through the hallways in a brief exploration. Eventually, he wanders into the library and finds a computer, recognizing the electronic device from the facility. With some experience, he navigates the functions and figures out how to post a video.

He stares impassively at the screen for a few seconds.] Doctors, Consortium, Val. [Addressing all three to see which one, if any, would actually respond to his call.] This is an amateur tactic. Rather disappointing.

[Now, to figure out what is this week’s experiment. They’re not on schedule for an F3 expedition. Strange.]

Sai. [Brief pause.] Kankuro, Temari. Report in.

Comments

[ action ] it's only gonna get worse... orz

[fifth_kazekage]

[Ishtar sometimes wore clothes that revealed parts of her body. When she did, he would try to look for her other scars then. He couldn’t force her to undress at random just so he could see the extent of her injuries. He still felt angry that he wasn’t able to protect her from being harmed… even though the apparent reason was termination, something he had no control over…]

If I wasn’t myself… then I would be quickly discarded and replaced.

[She really had no idea how much he trusted her. There was still a lot she didn’t know, because he was afraid of showing the darker parts of himself. He had a closer relationship to Ishtar than his own siblings. Which wasn’t hard, considering how they had behaved of late. Speaking of his siblings… he needed to know what had happened to them.]

......

[His body grew completely stiff when she repeated the confirmation. He was supposed to be dead, just like in the world he came from. It was stupid to hope that he wouldn’t have to suffer death a second time at the facility. Or… this would be the first, since he had yet to die.]

I wonder… [his tone sounding completely whimsical and detached] how it feels. To die…

[His arms fell away from her petite form and dropped limply to his sides. It almost felt like gravity was working in reverse effects, shifting his organs around and disrupting their usual functions. His stomach twisted, killing any sensation of hunger he might have had.]

Tell me, Ishtar. [He still didn’t sound like himself, but deeply embedded instincts had made him respond mechanically.] I don’t want to be left in ignorance.

[His head felt heavy, as if it took all the energy he had to keep holding it up. Slowly, his eyelids drifted down to a close, and he released a tensely withheld breath.

When he spoke again, his voice was very soft and uncertain.] Were the others terminated as well? Your friends… my brother and sister… Where is [he almost chokes on the next name before swallowing past the hard lump inside his throat] Sai?

[ action ] Yeah I know >>

[xroyal_bratx]

[ She didn't wear them as much anymore. The dresses were there for her occasional boredom, or if she wanted to look really nice. Ishtar was getting by with just simple clothes now, jeans and a blouse, and sometimes they were minourly revealing but otherwise, she learned to cover her scars with the clothes. They're not as bad as they looked. At least, to her they didn't feel so bad. It was a mark of her time there and what happened to her. It wasn't his fault that he couldn't protect her. He wasn't there and he didn't have to choice to stay or go and she knew that. ]

I don't mean it like that Gaara, because even if you think that, I don't.

[ She was grateful for his trust. She didn't know that he trusted her so much, so she would treasure it even more if she knew. She didn't let him go, not yet. She knew he was already feeling the emotional pain. She had spent enough time around him to know that. ]

It's not a process that anyone should feel. It's cold...and empty.

[ She quietly murmured. She remembered her death there, the emptiness she felt when she was out. The girl let out a small breath before she continued. ]

We're not really...ourselves, so to say. From what I've learned after you left, we're not ourselves, only clones of the originals. That's why people can be terminated can come back, and it also explains why people come back with memory lapses, or having no memory of being in Facility. ]

I have lost a lot of friends...family...your brother, I think he's gone from what I can remember. Your sister is still there....

[ He would not like what she had to say next about that particular person. ] He...was also terminated.

[ She softened her tone. ] I'm...sorry.

[ action ] poor Ish >: *patpat*

[fifth_kazekage]

[Well, he was going to make damn sure he protected her better from now on. Even if he wanted to distance himself from Ishtar, he could still make sure she didn’t get too deep into trouble. There were many things he could do from behind the scenes. He was a ninja, after all. And sooner or later, he would find out about the extent of her injuries. If it meant bullying the answer out of her, then he just might resort to that.]

…But it’s the truth.

[The redhead frowned at hearing her claim. How would she know something like that…? Unless she had…]

Cold and empty…? Have you… Were you killed at the facility? Terminated as well?

[The “good” news didn’t stop there. Gaara listened to her entire explanation without saying a word, taking a long time to process what she was saying. Clones of the originals? Then why did time stop back home and only continue when…? It didn’t make any sense. The logistics weren’t falling into place, and he was too stunned to even attempt piecing the puzzle together.

Sadly, it didn’t surprise him to hear that, at this point. Kankuro, terminated. Temari, still there at the facility, but given how they had parted…

Numbness sank into his nerves and gradually spread throughout his body. His sand, reacting to his emotions, was beginning to stir, down at Ishtar’s ankle. It moved restlessly, unsure of what commands their master wanted to be carried out. He didn’t have his gourd on him, fortunately, or there might have been a stronger reaction. It was unusually careless of him, but the sand wielder had honestly felt too drained and sore to lug around the heavy item when he first woke up.

He suddenly mumbled what seemed to be nonsensical things, when in reality, he was responding to Sai’s words from some time ago. His boyfriend had always claimed their relationship would be temporary, and he… was right, in the end. He had seemed so damn sure of himself, but Gaara didn’t want to believe it, at the time. Maybe he was destined to lose any close bonds that he ever made, over the course of his pitiful life. And if that was the case, then…]

You didn’t tell me it would end like this… You said it would end when I chose to end it… I never made that decision…

[Termination, clone, solitude. He could feel his head starting to hurt. His chest was already strained with growing pressure. Shukaku laughed and mocked him inside his mind, taking advantage of every opportunity to hit him during moments of weakness.

His fists clenched even tighter, to the point of pain. Gritting his teeth with effort, Gaara forced them to uncurl, and brought his hands to Ishtar’s shoulders, giving her one hard shove to push her away from him. He didn’t apologize for it; he just stared at her with a blank look in his eyes, as he tried not to give into the madness inviting him to succumb. He was still in enough shock to not act right away, which allowed the princess a small window of time to finish telling him any other pertinent information.]

[ action ] tis fine, she can deal with it like I've said over and over XD

[xroyal_bratx]

[ Ishtar didn't want to be always protected. She didn't need it as much, and those scars were the ones that were inevitable. She was careless and thus getting injured in the process. It was no one's fault but her own. Ishtar stopped asking for so much help, and trying to do things on her own. She kept her cool, while she embraced him. It was nice to see someone she hadn't seen in years, and having them with her, made her feel a bit stronger, that maybe she could protect him in her own way. ]

I don't think it's the truth. To me, I don't believe that. No one is replaceable, whether it's you or me. We're different from others.

[ She mused. There might have been a cold laugh from her. ]

I've been killed once, but that was out of my own carelessness, but I don't know about termination since, I am still here and very much alive, aren't I?

[ She mused with a small look at his direction.

She could not explain to him exactly how it was possible, but she was aware that they were different from their so-called 'originals.' Clones or not, they were still human, or demon, or whatever they were at home. Ishtar could feel his emotional pain, as he was there, limp in her arms. She didn't say anything, just letting all of it sink into his mind.

He might not enjoy the process, and he might not like it, but she would be lying to him if she didn't tell him the truth. She could never lie to him, knowing what kind of person he was, and what he had gone through. She didn't want him to lose trust in her. When he shoved her off, finally, she stumbled back a few steps, glancing at him, with sad eyes. She knew he was hurting, but what else was there to do in this situation? He'll have to accept it, just as she had. It was a painful process, but it wasn't impossible. ]

I think, we should stop here for now.

[ She mused, after a long moment of silence. ]

I know you are upset, and I know you can't really accept this, but it's the truth, and there isn't any way I can make this better for you. I'm sorry you had to hear all of that, but you wouldn't like it if I lied to you.

[ action ] yeah well the muse still doesn't like being an ass to her

[fifth_kazekage]

[He didn’t know that, and it was something he would have to learn. As far as he could remember, Ishtar almost always needed to be rescued. He knew Yujinn and Duzell, at one time, were helping her get stronger at the facility, but he didn’t know the extent of their teachings.]

What is our purpose for existing…? [He had no reason to pretend to live someone else’s life. He was an extra entity that had apparently been created from… he didn’t even know. It meant he would never return to Suna, never see his village again. No… not his village. He was just an imposter.] Without a reason to exist, it’s the same as being dead.

You were killed… But you are no longer at the facility. You had to have been terminated. [He lowered his chin, forehead lightly touching her shoulder.] Did you watch my body burn in the incinerator? [A cruel question, but he was responding on instinct rather than logic. If he relied on logic right now, he would be trying to figure out how it was possible for both of them to be alive if the Consortium or Doctors had killed them.

When the stranger had made these claims about the facility, Gaara didn’t believe him. Coming from Ishtar, he still had trouble believing it, but he trusted her. She had no reason to deceive him. There was the possibility that her mind had been altered somehow, which was something he needed to seriously consider. But for the time being, he would take her words at face value, and… he honestly didn’t know how to proceed from that point.]

No. [Slowly, he shook his head.] I don’t… want you to lie to me. I am tired of lies and deception. Ever since I was a child… it was all I knew.

[This situation was different, though. Yashamaru had lied to him to cause emotional pain, in hopes of alleviating his own, Gaara could only guess. His father had lied to him to try and kill off his emotions so he could be a better weapon. Ishtar didn’t hate him… for now.]

......

[Gaara nodded stiffly, accepting her suggestion.] If there is anything else important that you need to tell me…

[He wasn’t in the right mindset to process it right now. He needed time to think and run over all the possibilities. He didn’t exactly ask Ishtar how she obtained that information; for they knew, she had been tricked. The Consortium was always eager to pull whatever triggers necessary to try and ensure breaking their captives.]

…we can speak later.

[He closed his eyes for a moment, his lungs aching from a tensely-held breath. He finally released it, not feeling the least bit relieved.]

Thank you, Ishtar. …Be safe.

[His body swiftly dissolved into sand and swept out of the room, leaving the princess in silence.]

[ action ] awww Gaara. :\

[xroyal_bratx]

[ It was different now, even if he didn't know about it. He would see very soon, that Ishtar was not the same person he knew two years ago, but that was for another day. Yujinn had broadened Ishtar's magical skills since the day she had requested his assistance with her magical abilities, and Duzell was no longer there with her to help with swordsmanship. In substitute for that, Sebastian had been a great instructor, teaching her how to use her sword and be quick on her face.

She had also learned a number of things from Komui as well. His specialty in mechanical things, assisted Ishtar in learning how to tamper and play with mechanical like things. She wanted to show Gaara the extent of her new found abilities, but again, it would have to wait because they did not have the time for it right now. Right now, it was her trying to help this boy get back on his feet. She knew that it must hurt him a lot more, to have to deal with this. ]

...I've thought about it, and it doesn't matter. We'll find a reason for our existence. Everyone has a reason for their existence, or they can make one for themselves. I'm not taking this lying down, and you should do the same thing. It's hard, but you don't need an answer right away. You should look for your own answer, Gaara.

[ action ]

[xroyal_bratx]

[ She mused, rubbing her arms quietly as she said that. ] Can't you find your own reason for existing? Do you really need a reason set in stone for your existence? I've thought long and hard about it, and you know what...if I'm not the real thing, then I can do things the real one could not. If I was Ishtar, the way she was at home, then I wouldn't have been able to grow up, and I wouldn't have met so many influential people, as well as the ones I can call family.

[ She stopped short, seeing that Gaara and her had different views on all this. ] I was killed a while ago, and I cam back. Recently, I've been working with medical, and dealing with clone sicknesses, that a lot of us have been experiencing there.

[ She replied. ] I-- [ She looked down. She couldn't remember if she did, or if she was too sad to look. In the end, her answer was vague. ]

I don't know...if I did. It's been so long.

[ She retorted as he touched her shoulder. She shrugged into it, and then moved back. He probably wanted his space. ]

That's why I'm not keeping anything a secret from you. I don't want to deceive you. I promise, that what I tell you right now isn't fabricated, and it certainly isn't any Facility trick. I've seen it for myself. There are too many people here, and even the familiar faces, they don't know what I'm talking about.

[ She looked off. ] Yeah, there's lots more. I'm sure you have questions about me you want to ask as well. We'll speak later, yeah.

[ She offered him a small smile. ]

Please don't do anything that will hurt you, Gaara. I know you're smarter than that, but I can't help but worry.

[ She nodded her head one last time. ]

[ action ]

[xroyal_bratx]

I will, and you as well.

[ She watched as he disappeared, before she gripped Sidia tightly to calm herself. Eventually, she left the library as well. ]