[voice]

[hatesthefood]

Would someone mind telling what the hell is going on? Yeah, I got the note. Fat lot of good that did me. It didn't explain a damn thing! I know this isn't where I'm supposed to be, so why am I not there? Where exactly are we?

Oh yeah, one more thing. Why the hell am I wearing a collar? I'm not some damned pet!

Comments

[papshooshing]

YOU'RE SURE CARRYING ON LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL.

[hatesthefood]

I really don't give two shits what you think. I want answers.

[papshooshing]

SEE, THAT REALLY DOESN'T GIVE ME MUCH INCENTIVE TO PROVIDE SUCH ANSWERS.

[hatesthefood]

And the way you responded sure made me want to be nice back.

[papshooshing]

I'M A TROLL.
GET THE MIGHTY FUCK USED TO IT.
WE'RE NOT EXACTLY THE NICEST BUNCH THIS PLACE HAS TO OFFER.
THOUGH MANNERS AREN'T EXACTLY WHAT YOU SHOULD CONCERN YOURSELF WITH HERE ANYWAY.
YOU'LL JUST DIE SOONER OR LATER.

[hatesthefood]

I couldn't care less about manners and I'm pretty hard to kill, so I'm not too worried.

Who are you?

[papshooshing]

SO ARE SOME OTHER MOTHERFUCKERS I KNOW, BUT THEY HAVE ANYWAY.
THAT'S WHAT THIS PLACE DOES TO YOU, DIPSHIT.
YOU GET EXPERIMENTED ON AND DIE
THEN THEY BRING YOU BACK BECAUSE FUCK ALL IF THE FIRST FEW TIMES WEREN'T FUCKING FUNNY ENOUGH.

[hatesthefood]

Like I said, I'm not too worried. I'm pretty much already a dead man, so it doesn't bother me.

[papshooshing]

AND THE MACHISMO, OR HOWEVER THE CRAP YOU HUMANS SAY IT, WILL GET OLD.
FAST.
THAT'S REALLY ALL THAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ANYWAY
RIGHT AFTER JUST MAKING SURE YOU EAT THE DISGUSTING OATMEAL SHIT BEFORE ATTEMPTING TO HAVE ANYTHING ELSE.
RETCHING IN THE LOAD GAPER DOES NOT LEAD TO VERY AWESOME FIRST IMPRESSIONS.

[hatesthefood]

... holy crap, we have to eat oatmeal? Nasty.

[papshooshing]

WELL IT'S DEFINITELY NOT AS TASTY AS GRUBLOAF, BUT TRUTH IS TRUTH IN THIS CASE.

[hatesthefood]

Grub... what?

[papshooshing]

GRUBLOAF.
GODDAMN ARE YOUR OCULARS HAVING SOME SORT OF MALFUNCTION?
ARE YOU ONE OF THOSE HUMANS WITH A READING COMPREHENSION DISABILITY?

[hatesthefood]

I can see just fine! I've never heard of grubloaf!

[papshooshing]

OF COURSE YOU HAVEN'T FUCKING HEARD OF IT.
THE SHIT IS NATIVE TO MY PLANET, NOT YOURS.

[hatesthefood]

Holy crap. I really have gone insane.

[papshooshing]

I WONDER THAT EVERY FUCKING DAY.