[001 ★ voice]

[guiltapalooza]

So... my world's been destroyed. Yeah, not buying it. It's been tried before, by bigger and, well, probably better than whoever's behind this. In fact, I was sort of in the middle of the whole preventing the apolocypse game show right before I got zapped here, so if I could pretty please go back to that...?

Yeah, didn't think that would work. Well. Hi, everyone? I'm Willow Rosenberg, witch extraordinaire. At least they were nice enough to send me here with clothes and magic supplies. No way am I staying in the white phallus suit.

If someone could fill me in on the features that are not as advertised, I'd appreciate it. I'm sure there's all sorts of stuff to know about this place.

A tour might be nice, too. This is a lotta floors.

Comments

[guiltapalooza]

[All of this touchy-feeliness is finally catching up with Willow, and she has a faint thought of, huh, maybe trolls are more physically affectionate? Otherwise this might be getting a bit weird.]

Thanks, but no thanks. I'm not exactly the body modification type. [She shakes him off with a brief, apologetic smile so he doesn't take it personally, and swims over to the edge, where she hauls herself out and swings herself around to sit.] Not to mention I don't go swimming that much.

This was like... a pleasant interlude.

[wwaterboy]

[Hey, he's...safeguarding her, so she doesn't drown. Really. He has no ulterior motive in the least.

As she shakes him off, he swims back a foot or two, then follows her to the edge. He boosts himself out and wrings out his hair, grimacing at the way it plasters itself down. All the hair product in the world won't prevent that, unfortunately. He's tried.]

Wwell, yeah, I can't blame you. But maybe the next time wwe swwim - wwhich you said you wwanted to do - you should go more amphibious instead a piscine.

LMFAO omg i can't handle that icon

[guiltapalooza]

[There's a certain point where safeguarding becomes excessive and turns questionable, Eridan.

Seeing him wring out his hair reminds her to do it herself, and she squeezes the water out of her cover up as best she can, too.] I'll give it some thought. I'm a little worried I wouldn't be able to change myself back, given my track record.

He's so excessively beautiful

[wwaterboy]

You changed back pretty wwell today. I'm just suggestin' that you keep your air breathin' so you don't nearly drowwn durin' the transition.

[His pants are wet, but he grabs his shirt and begins to dress again, uncaring]

oh gosh this one is also fabulous LOL

[guiltapalooza]

Just because I haven't messed up in your proximity yet does not mean it won't happen. Don't make me bring out historical examples.

You have a good point, though. I'll put it on my to do list. [She gets to her feet and takes several steps away from the edge before doing a reverse of the zipping motion from earlier, bottom to top.

Her clothes from earlier come back, but somewhat damp. Willow pouts.] Example A of me not being perfect.

Eridan is always fabulous tbh

[wwaterboy]

[Eridan watches her with curiosity. Even if she messed it up a little, to him it's still impressive.]

Wwell, there's wworse things than bein' a bit wwet. Maybe it's a matter a practice, wwhich I'd be happy to provvide you wwith opportunities for.

[He offers a winning - and fangy - smile. Just joking around, Willow]

Anywway, in the meantime you wwant to continue our tour a the towwer?

it's true. only fabulous, nothing else

[guiltapalooza]

[She finds herself smiling helplessly back at him, unable to resist in the face of good humor. She's a sucker for approval.]

As long as I have back up for my practicing... why not? You're on.

For now, though, yes, [she goes on decisively.] Swimming interlude over, more tour.

alwways

[wwaterboy]

[He loves that helpless smile, and he returns it, a little uncertain, himself.]

I'll nevver let you drowwn, you can count on that. [And he heads for the stairs to lead the way up]

[guiltapalooza]

That is one the main qualities I look for in a friend, [she jokes agreeably, intentionally bumping shoulders with him as she catches up.

So it's a little flirty. She does what she wants, okay?]

[wwaterboy]

[He doesn't mind. He also knows she's joking, but grins anyway, buoyed up a bit by that.

The next floor is a maze]

I havven't really explored this floor, yet. Seems like a good wway a gettin' lost, but maybe there's treasure in the middle, for all I knoww.

[guiltapalooza]

I think I'll skip on that. Not so big on treasure, me. More big on not getting lost and potentially maimed by whatever lives in the maze.

[wwaterboy]

Wwell, there are wworse levvels than this one. I don't knoww if there are monsters on this particular levvel. [As they keep climbing, they step up into a completely dark level, and Eridan inches a little closer to Willow] Like this one, you just don't wwant to fuck wwith, I think. Someone told me that this levvel has things that grab you out a the dark.

[guiltapalooza]

... Uh, yeah, let's keep going. [Willow's not exactly nervous, but she's not eager to delve into this floor, either.] Getting grabbed out of the dark is not my idea of a fun time. It was pretty much not fun the first time it happened.

[wwaterboy]

I havven't tried it, but I don't particularly wwant to. Besides, the next levvel is wway better.

[He smiles at her, reassured by her confidence, and continues to climb. The following level is an aquarium, with no glass on the walls. Fish jump from one surface to the next]

Another place to maybe swwim a bit, if you like. Though there are monsters in these wwaters.

[guiltapalooza]

Oh-- oh, gosh! This place just keeps being pretty. So unexpected. [She instantly is coming up closer to the water-walls and stretching a hand out to touch, but she thinks better of it the second he says the word 'monsters'.]

Right, monsters. Swimming would be bad without being prepared, [she says sheepishly, walking back to the stairwell (and his side) with just a glance at the fish.] But we can keep it in mind.

[wwaterboy]

[He grins] Not too many monsters. I'm sure you wwouldn't havve anythin' to fear standin' on the stairs. And if wwe wwent swwimmin', wwell, I havve my rifle in my specibus, so nothin' to fear evven if your magic wweren't a powwer to be reckoned wwith - wwhich it is.

[guiltapalooza]

A power to be reckoned with, maybe, but only if I'm not too busy going oh god a shark, it's a shark, [she jokes, always ready to make fun of herself.] Not exactly something I have experience with.

Also, did you say rifle? Cause I'm not seeing a rifle in an anything. [Curious look. She didn't quite catch the word he'd used.]

[wwaterboy]

[He laughs. She's always so cute when she's making fun of herself.

He cocks his head at her confusion]

In my strife specibus. A course you can't see it right noww. [He activates it and his enormous rifle falls into his hands like magic] See?

[guiltapalooza]

[She squeaks and startles, apparently not over that habit from her younger years.]

Whoa, okay, not expecting that. Humans don't... do that. At least not my kind of human. I could maybe try to conjure one, but I don't know a lot about guns so I don't think it'd work.

But you didn't... conjure it, did you? [she asks more slowly, putting it together.] You said it was in your specibus? [Why was he using the plural form of Latin for cave?? The only conclusion she can come to is, troll culture is weird.]

[wwaterboy]

[He blinks, then reaches out into the air and pulls the Riflekind card out of his specibus, then shows it to her] It wwas in here. This is my specibus, right here. It holds my wweapons, and defines wwhat kinds a things I'm able to use as a wweapon, too.

[A slow, uncertain shrug] I'm just usin' a pretty basic one that Sol programmed for me. Didn't evven havve one for most a my life, but havvin' a computer genius kismesis wwith loads a cash has its privvileges.

[guiltapalooza]

[She peers at the card, trying to absorb this.] This all sounds pretty funky. I know a little programming, but I wouldn't have the first clue about how to program this.

So you have a... Riflekind specibus? Did you pick that?

[wwaterboy]

Pretty much came wwith the rifle, but yeah, that's howw it wworks, mostly.

[guiltapalooza]

[Straightens up again, indicating the card is through being expected.]

Buffy would kill for something like this. It seems way convenient for you weapon-using types.

[wwaterboy]

Actually, it's pretty fuckin' inconvvenient if you wwant to use another kind a wweapon. Luckily I'vve picked up knifekind, too, or I'd be pretty fucked. You can't exactly use Ahab on a fuckin' city street.

He makes the card and the rifle disappear, and begins to move up the stairs again]

[guiltapalooza]

... You can't use weapons you don't have a specibus for? [Her brow furrows.] That seems kinda silly. What if you're in dire straits and need to pick up a lamp and hit a vampire over the head with it? Do you need a Lampkind?