animus_network | 002 ♑ [second honk]

Entry tags:

002 ♑ [second honk]

HoLy mOtHeRfUcK, tOwEr pEePs
OkAy a bRoThEr gOt a fEw tHiNgS To gEt aLl oUt hIs cHuTe
FiRsT ThInG To bE AlL SpEwInG At tO ThIs sCrEeN Be

Uh

UhHh

Oh fUcK, oKaY I AlL FoRgEt wHaT ThE FiRsT MoThErFuCkEr wAs sUpPoSeD To bE BeInG
BuT ThE SeCoNd hAs tO AlL Do wItH ThIs dOpE FuCkIn pIeCe oF ArChItEcTuRaL BeAuTy
WhAt's tO Be gEtTiNg iTs mOsT WiCkEd oF ChIlLs oN RiGhT Up iN ThIs fUcKiN HaLlWaY
ChEcK ThIs sHiT OuT, mOtHeRfUcKeRs

[The video flicks on, a pair of gray hands fumbling with it for a second, then moving away to reveal an enormous pile of bike horns, pretty obnoxiously obstructing a majority of the top-floor dormitory hallway. Two large, orange-yellow goat horns zip in front of the picture as the author of the post begins chattering away instead of continuing to type.]

So like, I all thought to my fuckin' self, why this motherfucker gotta be holing up all in the crazy room by his lonesome with all these bitches when he could be all to getting his ass out at where there be more motherfuckers to all share them honk horns to! I got pies and Faygo, too.

[He pauses, straightening up so he's speaking directly in to the camera. Now visible, this troll comes complete with a monochromatic clown face and an untamed mass of gravity-defying black curls. He holds up a tin of green slime and a Redpop Faygo to lend credibility to his promise of refreshments. Long, stained fangs flash intermittently as he continues his advertisement.]

Uhhhhhh, and, uh. Oh, fuck yeah. Someone gone and stuck this motherfuckin' tower in the damn thermal hull, I think. So any motherfucker what's up for takin' their harshest of toasty snoozes all on at this fuckin' location be only have to fork up some to-be-determined currency. Once I all, uh, find out what this place all to be using for some such of things.

[A pause. His half-lidded, glassy eyes stare into the camera disconcertingly for a very uncomfortable length of time.]

Oh. Uh. ...That be all, motherfuckers! Get at me! Honk!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Gamzee'd finally backed off as Eridan sunk into the horns, maneuvering backwards on both knees to give the other some space (for once). He laughed, scooping fingerful after fingerful into his own mouth and looking on with a sort of odd jealousy.]

Still gets my fuckin' shit what's some peeps only take a motherfucking bite and go all naphappy in the pan!

[Leaning forward because he's laughing so hard, grabbing on to the floor like it was going to flip away from underneath him. Watching Eridan take a trip was a trip.]

You feelin' fuckin' chill as what's can be now, motherfucker?

[Eridan takes entirely too long to turn his head and actually look at Gamzee and then he squints a bit before reaching over and taking off the glasses because he can't see anything through the dark lenses. Turns out he can't really focus on anything in particular without them either, but then Gamzee is laughing and that sort of gives him an idea where he is.

And then he's just grinning the most goddamn stupid grin this side of Paradox Space, dopey and completely out of it and holy shiiiiiiiiiiiiit, what's even going on anymore?

So he just snorts really, really loud and cracks a rusty, laugh. And let me tell you, if that laugh was a song, it'd be the single most offkey monstrosity you've ever heard.]

[And so they're sitting there on the floor, laughing like complete dumbasses until Gamzee, at least, is out of breath. He's doubled over so much that his horns are the only things keeping him from toppling over on to his side. The tips are up against the floor, balancing his head and, by extension, his entire body.]

F...f-fuuuuuuuck, man, you... [Huff huff.] ...ain't as much a, like... [Wheeze wheeze.] ...stiff as what's my fishbro be! Hahahaha!

[Okay, he's two pies in now so they're both pretty far gone. Gamzee wraps his arms around his stomach because it hurts from laughing so much, but he can't stop. The world is beautiful, life is beautiful, and this stupid tower was turning out to be pretty motherfucking beautiful, too.]

[Eridan snorts, all but swimming in horns and the sluuuuuuuuuuuush inside his head. He fiddles with his sunglasses, playing with them without really thinking about it. He's not really thinking about anything, to be honest. Which is why he breaks down into a snicker fit.]

Dunno wwhat you're talkin about.

[And holy shit, his accent's all thick as the words just sort of stumble over his teeth and his tongue.]

Ampora be fuckin stiffest troll to evver stiff.

[And that's hilarious for some reason, though he can't quite pin down why. It just is. Everything's funny and hilarious and holy shit, he's cackling again.]

[Indigo tears crawl at the edges of his eyes from laughter, and he squeezes his eyes shut, picking up a stray horn and tossing it in Eridan's direction. He couldn't understand half of what he'd just heard, generally because he wasn't all there, and also because it was warped through that thick accent.]

There you be all spoutin' that motherfucking noise like what's all the fishes do! Gettin' to be at all fuckin' wwavvy on me here, motherfucker!

[He had never done a seadweller accent before in his life, and doing it now sent him in to fits of more laughter as he sat up and tilted his head back. The floor was starting to hurt him being in that position.]

[The horn hits a leg and Eridan sort of stares at it for a moment before turning back to Gamzee. He squints at him, trying to make out what he'd said. He'd said something. And it sounded wavy. But then Eridan notices the scarf tangled up all around Gamzee in the most disastrous fashion possible and his inner fashionista screams a little because that's so not how you handle a scarf, holy shit.]

C'mere.

[Except he's already moving, shifting his weight and nearly toppling over a few times. He jumps every time there's a honk and then he reaches out to try and grab the end of the scarf, but that only results in him falling over face first, in Gamzee's general direction.]

Wwoww. You'vve got a lot of horns.

[What was he doing again?]

[He honks in surprise, fumbling to try and catch the boy before he busts his face on the ground like his previous pie-buddy had. In a sluggish-but-quite-impressive display of reflex, his arms fly up to catch Eridan under the armpits. The effort is in vain, however, as one hand flies right over where an underarm should be, and the other just drops him because of the surprise.]

Shit, shit!

[Eridan's momentum just. Leaves him in a sprawl, landing with a dry thud. The pain not really registers as he pretty much takes a dive into Gamzee's crotch.

That's probably painful, isn't it.

But funny. God, everything is funny, even the stuff he can't remember anymore. So he just laughs that offkey laugh again, as boneless as he's armless right now. Nothing hurts. Nothing. Even absolutely fucking gone as he is, Eridan can marvel at the fact. Because something always hurts. Always.]

[He chokes out a sound that isn't human, isn't alien, and really has no equivalent because he just got a hi-speed face to the crotch and WOW DOES THAT FEEL NOT GOOD NOT TO MENTION MIGHTY AWKWARD. He involuntarily flips the offending force off of his lap, essentially throwing Eridan on to the floor rather roughly.

Well that... was not exactly nice but A BROTHER'S GOTTA DO WHAT A BROTHER'S GOTTA DO WHEN SOMEONE ATTACKS HIS JUNK OKAY.

But Eridan's got a hold of the end of his scarf and so, as he's flung to the ground, Gamzee's head kind of jerks sharply towards the floor as well.

This is all just a huge cacophony of grace.]

[Oh, that's gonna bruise, yes. Tomorrow there'll be pretty interesting green bruises all over the place. But right now Eridan barely notices it, wheezing as he lands. He stares for a moment, then breaks down laughing, tugging at the scarf.]

Daaaaaaaaaaaaaam, I mean, Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam, that's not howw you wwear a scarf.

[Pain. What is pain. Survival instincts, what are those. When I said nothing hurt is because nothing hurts. At all. It's all hilarious and ridiculous and oh, he's gonna hate himself when this is over. Definitely.]

[His head is jerked again, again, again, until he does fall over on to his side. Wowwww the walls are flipping and twisting and he's not sure which way is up for a second and then BAM there's an Eridan in his face talking to him about scarves and how not to wear them and he has pretty much forgotten there was a scarf wrapped around his head so he just stares at the boy like he's suddenly growing flowers out of his hear ducts.]

Huhhhhhhhhhh, this...?

[He stares dumbly down at the scarf in Eridan's hand, then looks back up at him for confirmation.]

[It takes a while to process the question, simple as it is. It takes a while to process anything, really, which is why Eridan sort of stares stupidly as Gamzee falls over. And then the first thing that registers is that the scarf and the head its wrapped around is closer and at hand. So Eridan sort of shifts and kind of sways and then he's all over Gamzee's face, tugging at the scarf to try and put it on properly, except he's too far gone to even know how to do that right.

And when the question does register properly, he's busy and peering down intently, as if he's solving the single most complicated piece of weird puzzle shit that ever came into being in all of GPI's creation.]

Yeah, you're doin it wwrong here. Gotta let the length billow an trail after you, lookin all dramatic and shit. Gotta be a cool kid, except when you step on it an fall down an it's just a fuckin' miracle you don't smash your horns to bits.

[Eridan finds himself somehow staring at Gamzee's horns. Oh well, there goes that train of thought. It'll come back eventually. Hope he's not strangling you with that scarf, there.]

Your horns are pretty.

[There's a moment of them staring at each other in utter confusion before Eridan starts to unravel the scarf wrapped tightly around Gamzee's head. He makes an over-dramatic face as his head is rocked to and fro from the unraveling, although it isn't too dramatic, because it actually is making his pan flip around inside of his head and Eridan's arms (arm) is just a flurry of gray flopping around in front of him.]

Whuhhh... don't wanna... fall down...

[He slurs and babbles as Eridan preaches about scarf etiquette, until there's a sudden halt in movement as he experiences what Gamzee is quick to identify as a miraculous zone. Best not to disturb this peaceful moment for the guy. He'll just stare off i-- oh okay well, now he's complimenting him. Okay, w e l l.

His eyes drift lazily up to meet Eridan's, quickly followed by a sleepy smile.]

Well thankssss, motherfucker. Your's ain't to be so much fuckin' all bad, either.

[They look like the other Eridan's, all wavy and shit. Are they the same? Let's just... reach up and touch them to find out.]

[Eridan had just been contemplating running his fingers along one of those pretty horns when Gamzee beat him to it. He blinked and stared, then blinked some more. That was nice. Then again, everything's nice when nothing hurts. And everything's funny and beautiful and nice.]

Real pretty.

[He reaches out to touch the pretty horns, and he accidentally bumps into Gamzee's arm. Haha, wow, this is kind of hard to do, actually! But hey, mutual horn fondling session: it ain't impossible.

Now let's get fondling some horns, my friend.]

[Thin, lengthy fingers twirled idly through every dip and curve of his horns. Blobs of color floated happily before his eyes, and he bobbed his head in to Eridan's outstretched hand as it approached. He seemed to be experiencing a sort of tunnel-sensation - everything around him felt blurry and fuzzy, except for the rigid angles in his hands. They'd felt so different than his own, more abrupt in shifting direction as opposed to the slow, swooping curves he was used to. It all felt fairly innocent to him, actually, sitting here touching a complete stranger he'd only met a short while ago.

He hummed happily, tracing his index fingers down the back slope of Eridan's horns.]

[Well, this is new and exciting! Mostly because Eridan doesn't exactly go around fondling horns, okay? Especially not from highblood strangers who drug him on a pile of horns. This whole thing is pretty new. And exciting. Has he mentioned that? He has a feeling he has.

Eridan runs his fingers along those swooping curves, seemingly fascinated by the combination of gentle turns and color. The colors are the most fascinating thing about everything. They all seem so sharp and poignant and pretty.

He's not thinking much by now, really, certainly not enough to think about whether this is innocent or not. Can't even spare the thought to wonder if this is even appropriate. So he just continues to finger the places where the horns melt into different shades of color, snickering somewhat.]

You're kind a just bright an wweird an wwonderful y'knoww.

[Gamzee couldn't say he's never felt a horn or a hundred before, since that's usually his Thing - touching and getting in everyone's business. People needed to loosen up and be more free with each other, you know? Everybody's wound so tight all the time, packing themselves in a bubble, afraid to reach out and have a little contact every now and again. This motherfucker had it right, getting to know someone, feeling up that shit you ain't ever been feeling before. Getting your hands all up in someone else's business, this is how you get to know a brother!

His thoughts drifted along this basic subject for a while, straying off a few times as the unfamiliar pressure on his head made his mouth drop open a little. His eyelids drooped down, down sleepily as his hands made their way to the first slope of Eridan's horns, smoothing at the hair that came up in wisps near the base.

Weird and wonderful, the words floated around and around through his head until he finally figured out why they were in his head to begin with. He'd been spoken to, and he struggled to lift his eyes to focus on, well, the green of Eridan's hair. Close enough to eye contact, right?

Well, no one's ever said something quite like that to him before. It was a nice feeling. This was a nice kid. Everything was nice. Mmmhmmmm.]

And you all be a dope motherfucker when you're to all get yourself calmed the fuck down, my most magical of brothers...

[Eridan laughs, running his fingers along Gamzee's other horn, in absence of his other hand. He's sluggish and easily amused and for some reason he can't remember why laughing is always so hard.

Gamzee's words register finally, and Eridan looks at him oddly, more through him than at him, really. He fiddles with some of that ridiculous mane at the base of his horns.]

People die, wwhen I'm not expectin it, so I expect it all the time.

[Good things nothing hurt because that would usually hurt like a fucking kick to the teeth. Instead of hurting, though, Eridan laughs. Because it's funny. So fucking funny. It's ridiculous and hilarious and nothing hurts.]

Not that it matters since wwe're all goin to die anywway! But I can't stop expectin it an I can't stop tryin to help.

[He looks down and nearly bumps his forehead on Gamzee's. His eyes are wide and unfocused and he looks all together too chirpy when he asks:]

Are you gonna die too?

[Well, this had taken a turn for the somber quite drastically. Not that Gamzee had minded, because if you feel that shit crawling up in your insides, then you just gotta flow with it and get it right out your chute. Get it right out so it can float off and mingle with the colors and homogenize into a blurry, beautiful mess to stare at. And suddenly, staring at the mess you've created, the mishmash of colors and feelings, you forget what it was that was weighing you down in the first place. Everyone should be allowed to be weightless every once in a while. If he could help this kid float away, it would make him so happy.

He shifted slowly, almost imperceptibly, feeling light as air himself. Made of a smooth, flowing breeze, sliding up on to his knees and leaning down to press foreheads together. His hands slid from the boy's horns, down his head to catch in the hair at the nape of his neck and hold his face up.]

There be some things in this motherfucking wicked show what's no one ain't supposed to be all to fuckin' see. Ain't no brother or sister want to be walking around got in their pans what's to be becoming of any magical child of the circus.

[He spoke slowly and gently, bumping noses and tracing his thumbs along finless jawbones.]

The only way be to dance this mystical show down 'til the end. Family come and go like the fuckin' tide, sure as motherfucking seasalt they all do. You bathe in that shit when it motherfucking come, and don't get your lament on after it go, you fuckin' feel me? We all take the final bow together at the end, motherfucker, so you just gotta get your smile all on and keep fuckin' dancing.

Edited 2012-03-04 07:37 (UTC)

[Eridan's laughter sort of dies out as Gamzee tilts his head up. Not abruptly no, just sort of fading into nothing as he stares at the other troll. And then Gamzee's talking and it's really nice, voice rolling over as he pulls them close together. It's really all Eridan needs to hear, though perhaps with a bit less "motherfucker" in it.

It's also a roaring shame he doesn't really understand anything that is said to him, because the sopor-induced trance pretty much makes it impossible to really thread thoughts together coherently. His head is just a mess of impressions and feelings and sensations, and the voice that's usually in the forefront, keeping all that shit in line and making sure no one ever hears or knows anything they shouldn't is off somewhere, trying to solve a Rubik's cube, blissfully unaware of all the things Eridan is saying or doing.

Everything's immediate and vibrant and utterly disarticulated, like stills from a picture you haven't really seen. Full of spoilers but without an actual plot. Gamzee's voice washes all over him, words unintelligible but tone pleasant and comforting.

And Eridan grins like an idiot, opens his mouth and...]

Did ya knoww... knoww... I forgot wwhat I wwas gonna say.

[And then he burst out laughing, going limp and boneless in Gamzee's hold.]

[Laughter was a better sound than that low, sad tone from before! It was infectious, and pretty soon he was honking out laughs just as hard as he was before. The teachings of the Messiahs always gave him solace - even if he hardly needed it to begin with. Even while on the most far-off trips, Gamzee could always remember their prominence. Hell, it was the sopor that made him understand them better. Opened your eyes to what's important, the shit did. Kids like Eridan were always forgetting to smile, forgetting to laugh. At least the boy had gotten his remember on of how to do so now.

His limbs felt a little like goop themselves, but he managed to roll and drag Eridan back to the pile, wobbling and cackling like a tool. He flopped himself down on the floor next to the horns, lolling his head around and watching the light show that had started on the ceiling.]

Shit happens like that, motherfucker.

[Eridan lets himself be dragged along, though he's never been particularly good at that, letting himself go with the flow. It's surprisingly easy right now, perhaps because he's not thinking straight right now. The world is dissolving at the edges, dripping down color and meshing the shapes. Eridan stares at it, aware somehow, that this is not how the world should look, but incapable of really connecting the dots between "not normal", "not okay" and "freak the fuck out". Hence the absolute lack of freaking out. Little thoughts flutter around his head, impressions mostly on colors and sounds and the way Gamzee's horns kept changing size in his perception.

It takes him a moment to realize the reason he's been rubbing his belly is because something inside is upset, because the sensation of his guts twisting into themselves can't quite cross through the fog in his brain and register. It doesn't register as pain, either, though perhaps it should. Eridan attempts to sit up, except he really can't muster much more than half-way raising his head and resting his weight on his hands. He looks around somewhat blearily.]

'm still hungry, I think.

[The slurred words bounce around, though he thinks that's not what he meant. Maybe. Or maybe it was. There was a half eaten pie by the pile, and Eridan thinks that'll be perfect to sate his stomach. After all, it was the pie that got him feeling this good, right?]

[This elicited another couple of chuckles from Gamzee, now laboriously lifting his torso off of the ground to sit up. Wooo. Let's just... take a moment for the brain meats to settle down. Let's get the eyes properly aligned, both facing the same direction, yeah. Yeah, okay. That's... that's good now. Mostly.]

Yeah? You still hungry, motherfuckerrrr?

[Laughing was just unstoppable for the both of them, it seemed. Gamzee dragged himself across the floor to fetch the pie, and scale half of the pile. He flopped halfway up the mound, head and chest resting next to Eridan's chest, with his legs draped behind him, still on the floor. He attempted to balance the tin on the side of the pile, spilling some pie out and over the horns haphazardly. He didn't seem to take any notice, however, and was busy trying to get his arm and hand to listen to his brain. He was getting a little generous with his portions now, cupping a hand and dragging his fingers through the slime. After downing quite a bit for himself, he'd placed his free hand on Eridan's stomach for support. Lifting his now slime-covered hand to the boy's lips, he absentmindedly drew a thick line across them.]

Open wide, brother.

Yeah.

[Eridan got distracted by Gamzee moving around, holding still as he settled in place. he let out a "woof" of air as Gamzee moved around and rested his hand on his chest, and took entirely too long to focus his eyes on the hand smearing sopor goo all over his face. He licks some of it, mostly on reflex, eyes half-lidded and completely unfocused. Whoa. Whoa. Vaguely, he remembers thinking he's not supposed to lick it off Gamzee's fingers. Fuck if he can remember why though. Mostly because his fingers are right there and we have established hard enough that Eridan can't really manage structured thought right now. Mind the teeth, Gamzee, 'cause Eridan's not really sure he can.]

[He wriggled closer, trying to get a better angle so as not to choke Eridan - with the way he seemed to be intent on chomping Gamzee's fingers off. He was too far past caring about the safety of his hands, however, and just focused on getting more slime out of the tin when it had been licked and bitten clean. Whoops maybe there was some indigo in there now, too. Who knew? Who cared?

Absentmindedly, Gamzee lifted a bloody hand to his own mouth to finish a scoop or two before he gave the last bits to his friend, elbows on either side of Eridan, his clean hand draped across the boy's chest lazily.]

I'll got 'nother one r'ght in the fuckin' resp'tbl'ck.

[His eyes didn't want to follow directions anymore, so he leaned his head in what he thought was the approximate direction of the nearly-empty pie tin.]

002 ♑ [second honk]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

i'm embarrassed this is embarrassing help

THIS... IS... HOMESTUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

eridan doesn't have troll rabies does he

who knows, maybe you should find out

that is the creepiest come-on EVER LMFAO

is that a challenge? 'cause I can do worse. CHALLENGE FUCKIN ACCEPTED.

bring it ho

/brings it

IT HAS BEEN BROUGHT MARVELOUSLY take a bow

so no kneeling after all?

(no subject)