animus_network | [006 ★ voice] backdated to yesterday

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[006 ★ voice] backdated to yesterday

I've been thinking about what to do about the giant spider everyone's been getting eaten by lately, and I think I came up with something. I'm going to ask the admins to get rid of it in the suggestion box. They keep saying they want to help us, so they should put their money where their mouth is.

To anyone that was wondering what it is, someone posted saying it was a lusus? Which is like a big animal thing that acts as a guardian for a troll. Not that that explains why it was eating people, which brings me around to--

Okay, I hardly know you, but Vriska Serket, what the heck where you thinking?! If it's your lusus, you can't exactly have missed what was going on! How could you just let it eat people? I don't care if they came back, it still ate them.

Are all of you that got attacked okay?

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[ She might be trying to check a little already as she's talking.. But even though she's a little absent-minded because of that, she still manages to catch that last part. ]

Feeling like you should do something like that.. You're a kind person.

[Willow assumes that she's checking, since that's what she'd have done right away, herself. She's not expecting to be called kind, and immediately becomes flummoxed and embarrassed. Cue nervous babbling.]

Oh-- oh, no, I'm just. It's what I should be doing. I don't know about kind. I'm making a big mess of it anyway; look at this post, it can't be kind if it's a mess. I think kindness precludes messes, contractually.

I think kindness isn't something that's messy or orderly. It's just.. what it is.

[ She nods a little to herself as she speaks, as if she's still considering it herself. ]

And you're trying to warn and help everyone, right? I think that's a very kind thing to do. Anyone would like to know a person like that.

I don't know. A lot of people aren't too happy about it, and... they're not totally wrong. I just don't see what else I can do.

I'd rather be wrong than not try at all.

.. I don't think it's a wrong thing. If something dangerous is going on, people need to be warned.. that's what the police does too, after all.

Maybe the people telling you're wrong are the ones who are wrong.

That's what I thought-- that everyone needed to be warned. And I wasn't even the one that named Vriska publicly.

Why is it a bad thing to hold someone accountable for what they've done without wanting to kill them for it?

Maybe some people think it's a bad thing. .. I think it isn't. People are responsible for their actions, right?

They have to be. You have to be responsible. You can't just try to make it go away and pretend it never happened, like maybe if no one knows it's not your fault. It still is.

Do you think they were going to try and do that? Pretend it never happened, hide what they did..?

.. I don't think a person like that sounds good at all.

I don't know. There's something going on, more than I know right now. And I might not find out what it is, either. [She sounds tired.]

I don't care. I just want it to be over.

... I'm sorry.

You.. don't have to feel bad about it though. It's not your responsibility, even if you might feel like it is.

That's the problem. I don't want it to be my responsibility-- I don't... like doing this. It's hard.

But it's not your fault that it's hard. It helps, that you think it's the right thing. It does help.

I don't mind helping if you need it. .. So.. if you need help.. just say it and I'll try my best. I'm not very big or strong or impressive, but still..

Hey, no, you don't have to be strong or impressive. [She's seen Xander struggle over that very issue for years, so Willow maybe feels a bit more strongly about this than she should.] You are helpful! Just listening. But hopefully we won't need to do anything else about this spider situation, and this will be it.

It'd be nice if this would just be it.. [ a giant spider doesn't sound like much good news in general, after all. ]

.. But you really think I'm helpful?

Don't be silly, [she scolds lightly, understanding the insecurity on a very personal level but trying to make light of it.] Of course you're helpful. Talking to unhelpful people is seriously frustrating, and do I seem frustrated? The answer is no.

You're fine.

[ despite the scolding, the tone in her voice is definitely perking up at this. ]

Thank you. I'll just try to do my best more and more from this point on then, so maybe one day I can become just as reliable and helpful as you are now.

R-Reliable, me? [She sounds a little overwhelmed, and embarrassed again.] I try. There is a lot of trying. I just don't know that I succeed all that much, so maybe you shouldn't take me as a role model.

I'm sure you'll do just fine if you keep at it. You have the motivation, and that's most of the battle right there. [She'd much rather be giving a pep talk than trying to deny a compliment, which always turns her into an awkward, babbling mess.]

.. I don't know.. [ she hums to herself, thinking a little blankly. ] I think you're succeeding here, probably, so.. you're not a bad role model at all. Unless I'm wrong.

But I'll still make sure to keep it up.

[Urotsuki is so earnest about it, Willow can't quite maintain her self-pity fest.]

How about we see if anyone else gets killed, and then we'll decide how good a role model I am? I think that's an okay criterion.

... Hmm, okay. I don't think anyone else will be killed.. .. or.. no, I don't want anyone else to be killed. [ a small nod to herself. ]

So I'm sure you prevented it.

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[006 ★ voice] backdated to yesterday

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