First Voyage; Text and then video

[chickenofthesea]

hdhsjardsadhfhkjfhkvh

turn on

write

where is the paper?????

dsjakleuwoiqrysf dashf

[WHACK. Hitting the computer activates the video function. Glaring at the screen is a tan-skinned man with pointed ears, a lovely gin-blossom nose, sunken eyes, and... green hair. And he's already changed out of that weird jumpsuit and into his normal clothes. The top of his orange collar is barely visible over his red cravat.

He narrows his eyes at the screen, then down at the keyboard]

Blasted... typewriter! What kind of contraption is this! Where's the paper?! Cursed LIARS, telling me I could communicate with people using this thing!

[and now he's shaking the computer. Or trying to]

HEY!! TELL ME HOW TO GET BACK, YOU INFERNAL MACHINE!! Put me back on my ship right this instant!

Comments

[chickenofthesea]

Tch! A jerk! I'll give him the what for if I ever see 'im!

[a groan]

But the kid -- Link! -- he said it was all lies. Are you saying it's not? I don't know who to believe...

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

I wouldn't do that unless ya got a whole bunch'a heroes to back ya. And even then, it's probably smarter to just run th'other way.

[Arm cross and a nod.]

Course it's a lie! If th'world got destroyed when my ancestor was brought here, I'd a'never been born! But I'm here so obviously it's a lie. And King Daphnes wished on the Triforce. The Goddesses aren't allowed to ignore a wish.

[chickenofthesea]

... Ah. Really. He's uh... pretty strong then, huh? Well! Sometimes it IS wiser to run away and regroup.

[read; ALWAYS]

Hmph... this is confusing. So there's no way back?

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Yeah, he is. He held his own against a bunch'a heroes.

[Pfft! Tetra rarely doesn't run.]

Ain't found one yet. But there's gotta be one. If ya can come in, ya can go out.

[Foot tap and then snapping her fingers.]

Oh yeah, if you ain't eaten that nasty oatmeal yet, have an apple ready for when you're done. Pipit showed me that.

[chickenofthesea]

Uh.... huh.

[note to self; RUN AWAY IMMEDIATELY]

Exactly! No door only goes one way!

Hm? [he hasn't eaten anything yet, to be honest] Why's that?

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

[Good plan.]

That's the general idea! Jus' gotta find that door now.

[Tetra makes a gagging face. Should be all the message necessary but she does adds words a second later.] Worst tastin' crap ever. Even my crew cooks better'n that.

[chickenofthesea]

[leave it to you real hero-y types]

Well! I'm an expert treasure hunter! I'll just treat the door like treasure.

[That was an unpleasant looking face] A bit of something to get the taste out of your mouth, aye?

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Best'a luck to ya.

[A quick nod.] Aye. And you'll need it!

[chickenofthesea]

I'll be bringing a bottle of whiskey with me, then. Nothing better to drown out the flavor of bilge.

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Whatever floats ya boat.

[Great, he drinks. That'll be... interesting. Tetra would never let her crew get drunk unless they were having a bit of shore leave. And even then, they'd have to be sobered up by morning.]

[chickenofthesea]

Do we have to eat that gruel? Why can't I just go get myself a sandwich?

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Anythin' ya try to eat before ya eat the oatmeal, yer gonna puke up apparently. I wasn't gonna risk it.

[chickenofthesea]

... I puke enough on my own time. I'll pass on more.

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

... Nice to hear.

[Ew.]

So yeah, yer gonna wanna eat the oatmeal then.

[chickenofthesea]

[TMI what is TMI.]

Thanks for the advice, kid's girlfriend.

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

[Obviously there is no such thing as TMI. To Linebeck anyway.]

Kids... what?

[Oh. That look.]

I ain't his girlfriend! And how would you know anyway?? It's Tetra!

[chickenofthesea]

Well, he did go through a lot of crap to save you! I just thought you two were... you know. Together.

Though I guess you're both a little young for that, yet.

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Well, yeah! We're friends, best friends. A'course we'd look out for each other.

[chickenofthesea]

So.

Just friends, eh?

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Aye, just friends.

[Arms crossed and looking stern.]

[chickenofthesea]

Well. If you say so then, Tetra.

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Exactly.

Anyway, if ya need anythin' don't worry about askin'. The people here ain't bad.

[Except Ghirahim. Creepy jerk. She spent a night curled up against Sky because of him.]

[chickenofthesea]

Well, except that Ganondorf guy, right?

[stop_calling_me_zelda]

Yeah, that Ganondorf guy is a total jerk.

[chickenofthesea]

Any other jerks I need to be aware of?