[Video] Who's already chewing the scenery? This guy!

[nomnommom]

[The video feed opens on a very cross, blackish-purple reptilian thing glaring at the camera with harsh, yellow eyes.]

This is General Ridley - any Space Pirate that intercepts this message is ordered to respond with a sitrep. I do not know where I am, nor why I've had this device put upon me... [He turns his head to point to the collar on his neck. The way he refers to it is very disdainful.]

What I do know is that this is NOT Zebes, and if this is the work of those damned Chozo or that infernal Aran woman, THEY WILL PAY DEARLY!

Comments

[yang_phase]

You're an impertinent one. What is this device?

[Video]

[nomnommom]

Given the situation, and being surrounded by a bunch of humans, I think I am allowed a little impertinence! Unless you can tell me where I am, I'm not interested in speaking with you, human!

Re: [Video]

[yang_phase]

Believe me, I'm not thrilled at the prospect of speaking to you, either. Instead of barking orders, however, allow me to get a better look at that collar of yours.

Re: [Video]

[nomnommom]

[Ridley just sneers at the screen.]

Excuse me? Did you just presume to tell me to something?

I think not.

Re: [Video]

[yang_phase]

Very well. Have fun figuring it out on your own.

[Video]

[cullionfish]

[Oh this one looks interesting...she smiles into the feed.]

You're in the Tower, just as we all are. Welcome.

[Video]

[nomnommom]

[Well. Who, or whatever this is, she's not human, that's for sure.]

A tower? What planet am I on?

[Video]

[cullionfish]

Can't say. They haven't told us, you see. We seem to exist here in a pocket dimension.

[She props her chin up on the back of her hand.]

You're an interesting specimen yourself.

[Video]

[nomnommom]

'They'. Who are 'they'? Why am I here, and where are my troops?

[Despite his annoyance with the situation, he's pleased by that comment, and smirks a bit. Perhaps he should introduce himself.]

I am Lord Ridley, commander of the Space Pirate military.

[Video]

[cullionfish]

The management here. You'll find they are rather scarce until something goes wrong. You should have gotten a letter somewhere in your living quarters describing the predicament.

[She offers a very sly smile in kind.]

The Condescension, Empress of Alternia and her sistering galaxy.

[Video]

[nomnommom]

Define 'something going wrong'.

I did see the letter, but I assumed it to be some sort of trickery set upon me by an enemy.

[Well then.]

Quite the title, there, Empress. I am afraid I have not heard of Alternia, but there are a lot of places in the cosmos that I'm unaware of.

[Video]

[cullionfish]

Quite a lot goes wrong in this Tower. Things like to attack, the power likes to go out. That sort of thing.

There are few who believe the letter holds any truth, but its all we have to go on, I'm afraid.

[She flashes her rows of shark-like teeth.]

I've lived a long time. I've made use of my immortality.

[Video]

[nomnommom]

Oh, wonderful. [His head sinks a bit at that bit of information. So not only is it not home, it's some place that has crap going wrong all the time.] I suppose it's better than it being boring.

So you have. I've yet to expand my own reach to an entire galaxy, but eventually.

[Video || Private]

[cullionfish]

[Oh good, just the type of creature she wants on her side, even if he does lead a band of pirates. Even the ceruleans had their use, after all. So she flips a filter on real quick before continuing.]

I would be careful who you share that information with around here, darling.

[Video || Private]

[nomnommom]

[That gets a curious look from Ridley.]

Oh? Why is that?

[zombee_slayer]

...Ain't you an ugly bastard? [Yep, that was, of course, the way he would naturally greet someone.]

[nomnommom]

[Cheeky little pink sack of...!] I am not here to be aesthetically pleasing to you, human.

[zombee_slayer]

I'll make ya look pleasing. Now what the fuck is your problem?

[nomnommom]

[That gets a derisive snort.]

Only there small little issue of NOT BEING WHERE I AM SUPPOSED TO BE! I know you humans are dense, but you really are a sterling example of it!

[zombee_slayer]

LOWER YOUR DAMN VOICE, MEAT SACK!

[nomnommom]

[Aw snap is this a volume contest?]

LORD RIDLEY LOWERS HIS VOICE FOR NO ONE, ESPECIALLY A DISRESPECTFUL HUMAN!