Jade Strider (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
reddeadvirtuoso) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
animus_network2012-07-09 11:59 pm
reddeadvirtuoso) wrote in animus_network2012-07-09 11:59 pm
001 | text
is it too much to ask for a little fanfare for the end of the universe?
i mean come on im out there busting my ass to do damage to an oversized electronic that a two year old could do with gravity a hard floor and fifteen seconds of irresponsible parenting
the least i could get is some fucking fireworks when the universe ejects you from existence!
but fine whatever
first order of business
who the fuck took my shovel?
you give me my gun and my rad pjs and you dont give me my shovel thats stupid
second order of business dont step on the black globs
it sucks and its stupid
third order of business dont eat the eggs here theyre fucking nasty
like seriously poultry doesnt even come in that color
maybe they made it from the black globs
i mean come on im out there busting my ass to do damage to an oversized electronic that a two year old could do with gravity a hard floor and fifteen seconds of irresponsible parenting
the least i could get is some fucking fireworks when the universe ejects you from existence!
but fine whatever
first order of business
who the fuck took my shovel?
you give me my gun and my rad pjs and you dont give me my shovel thats stupid
second order of business dont step on the black globs
it sucks and its stupid
third order of business dont eat the eggs here theyre fucking nasty
like seriously poultry doesnt even come in that color
maybe they made it from the black globs
no subject
dave you ok
[Eridan already said he was better but considering the last time she saw him his skin was dark grey and he had weird lines on his face and she was about to orchestrate the end of their universe, it was best to double check.]
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better than fine simply superlative in fact
why the past several months have been nothing but comfortable relaxation under the grandiose generosity and downright humbling hospitality of our ever so gracious and benevolent hosts even if their activity choices leave much to be desired to put it mildly
but thats such a minor complaint that it scarcely bears mentioning
i dont know where anyone would get the idea otherwise in their heads how simply absurd or even quixotic i dare to say while imagining that the man of la mancha was being reflected in an entirely lucid mirror of broken glass thus lending opposite credence to the words impact
im fine
clearly as you can see everythings fine
everything is fine and nothing is in shambles
especially not myself
[He knows Jade is going to call him on this and it's dripping with usual sarcasm, even if he went out of his way to stick a confusingly-worded contradiction of most of the bullshit he just spewed in there.
But even after all of this, he really can't bring himself to be open. At least not where others might see.]
no subject
we get it youre a troubled teenage boy who spent too much time at the library and didnt get enough hugs as a child
btw for someone that spends so much time thinking of stupid la mancha metaphor bullshit youre a shitty liar :|
and i dont need to know the life story of a fat man with a phallic obsession to tell me that youre not ok
so cut the crap and tell me whats up before i come punch you in your prissy little face
no subject
[followed a second later by this.
fine then
as you wish
just not here if its all the same
where are you
[...all of a sudden he really hopes she hasn't seen The Princess Bride.]
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chop chop farm boy
[YOU FOOL EVERYONE HAS SEEN THE PRINCESS BRIDE]
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He's there in a few minutes. No grindork going on, but that shadow's definitely unnatural. Shades are on, which is...unusual. BE COOL MAN KEEP IT TOGETHER]
no subject
So what up, dark knight? You still got the horrorterrors on speed dial, or are the shades 'cause you're not supposed to rise during the day?
[She would be crossing her arms and tapping her foot impatiently if that was cool and not reminiscent of how she imagined Eridan to be half the time they spoke.]
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[echo, some hollowness, but otherwise... anyway. those shades are on mostly for the sake of keeping his facade from totally falling to shambles, it's k. his voice is...he sounds tired, more than anything--but the sight of her is helping. his body language is also, uh. a fair bit more reserved than before.]
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[She wasn't going to get upset! No way was she going to get upset. Cool kids didn't get upset. She wasn't going to get angry either because cool kids didn't get angry! Cool kids kept their shit together. Cool kids were able to fix their stupid friends when they rambled about stupid horrorterrors.
She wasn't very good at body language, but Jade was the one that wore shades that David was supposed to make fun of. So, hoping that her own shades and scarf would hide how pissed off and upset she was, she stepped forward, ripped the sunglasses off David's face, and threw them on the ground. She wasn't strong enough to actually break them, but damn if she didn't try.]
Fuck her.
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His mouth doesn't shift at all, but his eyes tell a very different tale.]
I'm rather inclined to agree, after five months of being made to deal with it.
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Then get rid of it already, you stupid fucking prick or I'll do it myself.
[She was pretty shitty at words and she barely understand everything that was happening in the first place, but she knew it wasn't good and she'd said she'd fix it, goddamnit.]
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It can't be done.
[David of all people admitting that something is impossible. Fuck.
to his knowledge, anyway.]
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[Look at how many shits she gives about your opinion right now, she is rapidly approaching the zen point of anger and hardcore determination.]
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[it's not that he wouldn't welcome it, he's practically desperate actually. he just doesn't see how it would be done]
Then let's find a way, shall we?
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[And a grin.] Hell fucking yes-- that's what I'm talking about. Just you wait, we'll turn your head into a self-sufficient bachelor pad in no time.
[Not that she really had any idea how to fix it but uh. Damn if she wasn't gonna try.]
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[he's lost himself to Yggdrasil once before here it really wasn't pretty]
I'm rather fond of this plan, inasmuch as it can be called a plan...
[don't worry there are tons of people here who might know something about how to deal with this shit. WE GOT THIS
stregafam could probably at least work as people to bounce ideas off of, they know a feel pretty close to this one well enough.]
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But nah, she does obey his request, instead turning on her heel to stand next to him and throw an arm over his shoulder
even if he's a bit taller than her shut upand gesture to the space in front of them as if there was some kind of battle plan in the air.]It is the best plan, OK. It's a flawless plan. Just leave it to me.
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... oh, yes. Yes, this is absolutely bound to end well.
[SUDDENLY HE HAS CERTAIN MISGIVINGS, WHEN SHE PUTS IT LIKE THAT]