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[reddeadvirtuoso]

is it too much to ask for a little fanfare for the end of the universe?
i mean come on im out there busting my ass to do damage to an oversized electronic that a two year old could do with gravity a hard floor and fifteen seconds of irresponsible parenting
the least i could get is some fucking fireworks when the universe ejects you from existence!
but fine whatever
first order of business
who the fuck took my shovel?
you give me my gun and my rad pjs and you dont give me my shovel thats stupid
second order of business dont step on the black globs
it sucks and its stupid
third order of business dont eat the eggs here theyre fucking nasty
like seriously poultry doesnt even come in that color
maybe they made it from the black globs

Comments

[reddeadvirtuoso]

pot callin the kettle black

[restitchtime]

Sorry, but no. My conversational roadblocks luckily don't include an ego with the gravitational pull of Jupiter, although you're obviously making up for my lack in spades.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

hahaha good one!
you are definitely the most humble of saints i have ever had the pleasure of speaking with

[restitchtime]

Damn right. Canonized for not going batshit thanks to my childhood and the patron saint of fucked up kids in shitty situations. Assholes can fuck right off, but that's a given.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

hey careful
if you gloat too much about your triumph over childhood adversities youll lose your sainthood
they dont like you stepping out of the lines of that kind of stuff it makes them look like they think being happy is ok

[restitchtime]

The only gods I know can go fuck themselves with their own tentacled appendages, so I really don't give a shit about their rules. I'll be whatever the fuck I want to and they can suck it.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

horrorterror tentacle gods dont have saints
thats just silly
they have crazy cultists that draw pentagrams and sacrifice virgins to the monster in the well

[restitchtime]

That's a saint to them, didn't anyone ever send you the updated dictionary? And I don't know about your shithole of a universe but I keep my fucking wells policed and clear of body parts.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

shit did i miss the newest edition of "new bullshit words for the new decade"?
fuck
oh well you cant police every well
theres probably at least one in china with some dragon demon eating kids down there

[restitchtime]

China doesn't exist anymore and with it went all the fucks I gave about what happened to it. I'm down to three assholes and only one is at risk for that brand of crazy; makes keeping an eye on the water supplies a hell of a lot easier.