animus_network

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okay, iit doe2n't exactly make up for everythiing.
but all of you troll2 can ju2t go ahead and be jealou2 of my recuperacoon, biitche2.
ii'm gettiing 2uch a fuckiing good niight 2leep toniight, you ju2t watch.
2ucker2.

[Locked to Psiioniic]

thii2 ii2 2ort of embarrassiing.
are you okay?

[OOC: um. What hiatus?]

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What's so funny!

[Finally he manages to get ahold of himself. He gets to his feet, shaking his head]

You wouldn't think it wath funny if I came to your rethpite block waving around whatever thing humanth uthe to hold their genetic material? Come on.

[He pulls out his key and moves to unlock the door] Come in, but leave the pail outthide. I don't want to look at it. Tho fucking awkward.

[She raises an eyebrow at him] Holds your genetic material? I'm not even going to ask how buckets are like condoms, nope, I don't want to know.

[She pushes the bucket away from the door with her foot. She never wants to see another bucket again, but once she steps inside she has another concern]

What the hell is that? [why are recuperacoons a thing]

Good, becauthe I'm not making thingth even more awkward by trying to ekthplain it. That ith not a converthation we're having. Ever.

[The huge, upright, two-sided 'coon is sitting next to his sleeping rectangle, filled with red and blue sopor slime. In another corner is a small bee hive, purple bees buzzing around it lazily.]

That'th my recuperacoon, filled with thopor thlime. It'th where I'm going to thleep tonight.

[He gives it a pat] You want to try it?

[A six year old just invited her into her bed which is actually a cocoon filled with slime. She's crazy. She's in a mental hospital and this isn't actually happening.]

Are you crazy? No, I do not want to try it!

[Shrug] Your lothh. It really maketh you thleep deeply. Not like thethe weird thingth. [He aims a light kick at the bed.] Too thoft and open to the air. And no thoporiffic qualitieth at all.

[sarcastically] Yeah you must run though like five pillows a week because you've maimed them with those ridiculous horns on your head. Why not live in a cocoon full of slime that puts you to sleep?

No kidding! Thethe thtupid thingth are tho fucking uthelethh! [He gestures at a pillow contemptuously.] No wonder you humanth are tho thoft and thquishy, though. If thith ith how you live.

Sweetie, I meant your horns are stupid, the pillow is fine, the pillow is normal. And there's nothing wrong with having a soft body.

[His red and blue eyes narrow at her] What'th thtupid about my hornth?

The fact you have them.

[Blinks slowly] Are you thaying that hornth are thtupid? Any amount of hornth? Ith that actually what you're thaying to me?

Yes. Any amount of horns are stupid.

Wow. You really are a bitch.

[He lifts her up into the air with his powers]

There's nothing wrong with being a- [and then she is lifted] Hey! Put me down! Let me down right now!

It'th not tho much that you're a bitch.

[He doesn't even seem that mad. Actually, he's grinning, and it's suddenly obvious that he has a double mouthful of very sharp teeth]

It'th that you're a thtupid bitch. It'th like you're doing it on purpothe. Tho I guethh I'm jutht here to give you what you're obviouthly angling for.

[And he dumps her in the recuperacoon.]

Hey, listen here, I have no problem being a bitch. Hell, I am proud of being a bitch. But no one, ya hear me, no one calls me stupid. Now let me down so I can beat the crap out of you.

[But then he's smiling and she is getting awfully close to that stupid cocoon and, oh no.] Do not drop me in your stupid slime! [but she's dropped. She comes up sputtering, covered in slime and generally freaking the fuck out. She shouts at him in Spanish as she attempts to get out] You asshole. You are going to pay for this. I'm from Lima Heights Adjacent, you know what happens there? Bad things. I am so going to get you as soon as I can get the hell out of this thing. You better start running!

[U mad, Santana? He just stands there, watching her sputter and squirm around in the slime. He's not in the least bit scared of her mouth, or her threats.]

Thquishy little monkey! You'd better have one powerful weapon in your thpethibuth if you think you can beat my awethome pthychic powerth in a fight!

[And he gestures to her] Come at me, bro.

[She stops flailing around in the slime, instead she smirks]

Remember how I bet you I could get your slime? Well, I win. As the winner I demand you get me out of here. Right. Now.

[Eyeroll] You don't have my thlime. You're jutht covered in it.

If I walked out of this room right now, I would be in possession of some of your slime. I win.

Thome of it. God, you jutht can't admit that I totally beat you and humiliated you, can you?

[He picks her up with his powers again and begins towing her to the bathroom without letting her feet touch the ground]

Sorry, when did we say I needed all the slime I figured thome [yes, now she's making fun of you] of the slime would be enough. So again, I win you lose and now you're nicely carrying me around. I could get used to this whole not needing to walk thing.

Whatever you thay. [He dumps her in the ablution trap and turns the water on - cold only - then slams the door shut. All without ever entering the ablution block at all]

Hey! [suddenly bathtub] I get that you're like a creeper, but are you going to at least bring me new clothes or are you planning on taking your creep to the next level?

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