animus_network | 001 [action/text]

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001 [action/text]

Specifically for the occupants of 2-10
_{[When Dirk awakens and can't move at first, he finds himself panicking. This isn't something that normally happens, so it's a huge relief when he actually is able to move. Immediately, he's able to tell he's not where he should be. His memory is a little hazy due to the fact he's still waking up, but he knows that the last thing he was doing, which certainly wasn't sleeping. Who could sleep when their home was under attack?

The letters he finds answers a few of the initial questions he has, but it leaves a billion more unanswered. His world was destroyed? Given the state it was in, he isn't surprised, but he was supposed to get into the game first. He's pretty sure this isn't it. This is horribly disconcerting, because he can't help but wonder about his friends. Did they make it to safety? Are they here?

After another few moments, he's aware he's not the only person in the room either. Well then.]}

...Who are you people.

Network; open.
I'm not entirely sure what is going here, so perhaps someone can shed some light on this situation.
How is it that I've arrived here?
I'm finding the information provided by the welcoming committee highly doubtful for a multitude of reasons that I don't have time to get into at this time.
With that, I'll cut to the chase; in the off-chance that it's actually correct, that my world was destroyed, I must ask.
Does anyone know Roxy Lalonde, Jake English, Jane Crocker and their whereabouts?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Whoa now, there's no need to get raunchy on me. Just because the tower's interested in your kinky fashion orgies doesn't mean I am.

I think the only thing that could make a bigger headache than the idea of a universe with a Lalonde as the only other living human is the way this place is fucking with the timeline. I'm surprised that my eyes haven't burned out of my skull from trying to figure it out yet.

My apologise; how foolish of me to not take your sensitivities into consideration.

The circumstances are shitty in general but without her it'd be even worse.
Perhaps I should clarify: she's a dear friend of mine.
What timeline are you from, then?

You should be sorry. Didn't anyone ever tell you to keep your twisted fantasies away from a lady's delicate ears?

Not yours, I'll tell you that. We've got one surname in common, maybe another depending on yours, and no first names that match at all. And definitely no Lalondes who could manage social interaction long enough to get a dear friend.

I'm afraid I wasn't taught that in charms school.

Name's Dirk Strider. How does that factor into it?

Personally I'd like into suing a piece of shit place like that. You're lucky that I'm pretty damn tough - anyone else probably would've fainted right off.

2-0 and horrible luck as usual. Business as usual in the department of Time Fuckery, really.

I lucked out then, didn't I? I would've darn well felt dreadful.
Frailty thy name is woman ect.

Elaborate, please.

You've got a conscience left? Damn, I guess we both lucked out in this little conversation.

Oh, come on. I'm sure you think you're pretty damn smart. Put the pieces together and make a nice assumption yourself.

It's a miracle.

I won't lie; I'm fairly intelligent, but the chances of me putting all the pieces together accurately given all possibilities?
Very slim.
The only other Strider I know of is Dave.

More of a good hit on the roulette table than anything else. Miracles are for universes that don't suck punch after breaking your legs.

Oh well, I guess there really is no rest for the wicked. You know the other assholes Dave hangs around with?

Very true. I doubt such a place exists, in all honesty.

Actually, yes, because we've been aware of the other universe and Jake was making a gift to send.

Rose Lalonde, John Egbert, Jade Harley.

Hey, let me dream. It's the only thing keeping my from clawing my face off while screaming into nothingness.

Great, saves me a little exposition time. Swap around some surnames and you've got my universe. Nice and simple.

Alright; dream as much as you want. Let them take you places you've never thought you'd go.

Easy enough.
Rose or Jade?

Aaaah, there I go, off into the beautiful fantasy world of a normal childhood and a future with no flaming meteors in it.

Isn't it sad how quickly we all adjust to universe fuckups? I've got too much common sense to be Jade, so I'm stuck with Rose as usual.

Enjoy it while it lasts, Sweetheart.

What other choice is there? That is our lives, a bundle of timesy shenanigans.
Anyway. It's nice to meet you, although it would've been preferred in other circumstances.

Too late, that nickname shattered it. I'm back in the real world with a merry band of assholes surrounding me.

Yeah, well, shenanigans wait for no man. We'll just have to pretend we bumped into each other somewhere more civil so the natural balance isn't too out of whack.

I can't say I'm too sympathetic; I've been here the entire time.

Sounds like a decent enough plan. What was it, a nice spring day and we just happened to bump into each other and were like, 'whoa, we look like we could be related'?

It's not my fault that you've got no imagination. No need to go around kicking over other people's sandcastles just because you can't have one of your own.

Sounds about right. And then we chatted about genetics and the weather and went and caught whatever stupid movie was playing in the theaters at the time.

It can't be helped. Don't let it upset you for too long; that's just how things are.

To top it off, we got ice cream afterwards. Best in Houston.

Too bad you've decided to tangle with the queen of grudges. I'll hold this beyond the end of time and space itself, no matter how justified it is or isn't.

Fuck, the way that first meeting turned out I'm surprised that we're not bosom buddies already.

Oh fate, you cruel creature. Woe, the moment I come upon a fellow Strider I force her away with my uncouth personality.

It just wasn't meant to be until now, so what do you say?

That's what you get for being a total dickwad. Maybe you'll learn something from this fiasco and come out a less intolerable person.

I say why the hell not? Nothing else to do around here.

I can't help it, sis. It's the way I was raised.

Sweet. What floor are you on, anyway?

Considering I'm pretty damn sure you raised yourself the point still stands.

Right now I'm in one of the terminals on first floor. If you think you're getting an actual dorm number out of me you've got another thing coming, though.

Don't you think you should go easy on me in that case.

Okay. I could walk down there, if you want me to.
That's fine; I don't want to give you my room number either. How do I know you're not some crazy psychopath?

Must I point out that's jest?

If anything I should let even less slide. You're one of the last representatives of our species, you need to at least try and not make everyone else glad we're functionally extinct.

I don't know, are you going to assume that I'm too stupid to take a joke from here on out? If you do you might want to watch out when you trot on down here - I might be too stupid to not try and take a swing at you.

Your turn to figure out if it's a joke. Isn't this fun?

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