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[reddeadvirtuoso]

is it too much to ask for a little fanfare for the end of the universe?
i mean come on im out there busting my ass to do damage to an oversized electronic that a two year old could do with gravity a hard floor and fifteen seconds of irresponsible parenting
the least i could get is some fucking fireworks when the universe ejects you from existence!
but fine whatever
first order of business
who the fuck took my shovel?
you give me my gun and my rad pjs and you dont give me my shovel thats stupid
second order of business dont step on the black globs
it sucks and its stupid
third order of business dont eat the eggs here theyre fucking nasty
like seriously poultry doesnt even come in that color
maybe they made it from the black globs

Comments

perma-text

[reddeadvirtuoso]

gonna go ahead and put that on my list of shit not to do thx

[restitchtime]

Then shut the fuck up with dumbass posts like this and maybe someone will actually feel bad and help you when it happens anyway.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

oh shit i am on some freaky kidnappers equivalent of the internet doing stuff you disagree with even though it wouldnt have affected you if you ignored this
stop the world we have to rectify this problem asap before we have a tower-wide catastrophe on our hands!
protip princess i care about as much about your bitching as you care about my complaints

[restitchtime]

Jesus christ, someone in the tower actually wants to focus on getting shit done instead of sitting around with their thumbs up their asses!

My bad, I forgot that I'm the only one in this dump with more than six brain cells and the ability to focus on something for more than twenty seconds. I won't make the assumption of you being competent again.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

so its more productive to sit in front of the computer and tell me how im doing it wrong instead of
idk actually doing something?
got it
thank you for sharing your wisdom

[restitchtime]

Amazingly, other people are capable of multitasking. I know how the five minutes it takes to call you out on your bullshitting must seem like all the energy allotted for a single day, but luckily not everyone is as incapable as you are.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

but if im such an insufferable idiot thats wasting her time and brain cells wandering around like an ass and doing stupid shit in your eyes
why bother?
honest question

[restitchtime]

Because I chew out fuckwits as a stress reliever. It helps me relax and usually ends up making them so ashamed they never post again as an added bonus.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

see now we argee on something
stress relief is important!
ill spare you the details so you dont go off on me for being a pussy-whipped whiner fishing for sympathy
but needless to say i just got out of piles and piles of hopeless bullshit
and woke up in a strange tower in some freaky white condom suit
so tl;dr a lot of stress
so i decided to explore this place and post on the computer to get some relief from all of that bullshit and to distract myself from all of the new bullshit
because being stressed out in a stressful situation fucking sucks
whether or not you actually give a shit about everything i just said is up in the air
but ill tell you now that i wont stop doing what ive been doing today as long as im here so how about you calm your fucking tits
get out of my face and get a hobby thats actually productive like you like putting so much emphasis on!
annoying broads who still have nothing better to do with my time arent really up there on my destressing list

[restitchtime]

What's the matter, did I hurt your delicate feelings by not hanging off every word of your ickle post? I'm sorry princess, I didn't stop to think about how you were made of glass. You don't have to cry because somebody on the internet was mean to you.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

wow you have literally not read anything ive said have you?
im getting the vibe you just like reading and listening to yourself talk
sitting hunch over the computer going 'ohoho that was a clever one self cant wait for them to read this so they can see how obviously superior i am to them!
this will surely show the world that i am the shit'

[restitchtime]

You might want to try talking about someone other than yourself when you're having a conversation. It kind of makes the whole back and forth shit go a little easier.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

pot callin the kettle black

[restitchtime]

Sorry, but no. My conversational roadblocks luckily don't include an ego with the gravitational pull of Jupiter, although you're obviously making up for my lack in spades.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

hahaha good one!
you are definitely the most humble of saints i have ever had the pleasure of speaking with

[restitchtime]

Damn right. Canonized for not going batshit thanks to my childhood and the patron saint of fucked up kids in shitty situations. Assholes can fuck right off, but that's a given.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

hey careful
if you gloat too much about your triumph over childhood adversities youll lose your sainthood
they dont like you stepping out of the lines of that kind of stuff it makes them look like they think being happy is ok

[restitchtime]

The only gods I know can go fuck themselves with their own tentacled appendages, so I really don't give a shit about their rules. I'll be whatever the fuck I want to and they can suck it.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

horrorterror tentacle gods dont have saints
thats just silly
they have crazy cultists that draw pentagrams and sacrifice virgins to the monster in the well

[restitchtime]

That's a saint to them, didn't anyone ever send you the updated dictionary? And I don't know about your shithole of a universe but I keep my fucking wells policed and clear of body parts.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

shit did i miss the newest edition of "new bullshit words for the new decade"?
fuck
oh well you cant police every well
theres probably at least one in china with some dragon demon eating kids down there

[restitchtime]

China doesn't exist anymore and with it went all the fucks I gave about what happened to it. I'm down to three assholes and only one is at risk for that brand of crazy; makes keeping an eye on the water supplies a hell of a lot easier.