1st Time in Text

[knightime]

man
what the ever loving fuck was that???
alright
thanks so much shitty tower
i wanted to see earth as a desolate shithole
forget the fact that it shouldnt have even existed
and i was bored out of my skull
ugh
whatever
im back
got a little lost and went by the ruins of earth
etc
worst roadtrip
the radio kept playing bruno mars on repeat
the ac was busted
i have sand in places i didnt think it could get to
the scenery kind of sucked
considering there was none
what i miss???

Comments

[restitchtime]

More like we'll probably just get gold embossed invitations to the next slasher movie reenactment. Hey, but it's the thought that counts.

[knightime]

at least they tried
five star treatment
i mean i guess this would be five star treatment for a shitty murderous tower
i cant really tell you since this is my first time
usually dont go checking into places like this
its bad for my health
especially my complexion

[restitchtime]

And god knows that we can't have you breaking out in more serious acne than you've got now. What's left of the world would probably spin off its axis.

[knightime]

the world would shrivel up and die
how dare they destroy such a beautiful and perfect strider complexion
all is lost
nothing can be salvaged

[restitchtime]

It's basically the last omen before the collapse of existence as we know it. Definitely needs to be avoided at all costs.

[knightime]

lucky for everyone
crisis has been adverted
this perfect skin is no longer marred
ive got this shit handled

[restitchtime]

Thank every deity listening in on this near cataclysm. Your magician-like construction of makeshift facial products will save us all from certain doom.

[knightime]

sbahj brand acne face wash
proven to get rid of anything that doesnt belong on your face

[restitchtime]

And to add a healthy smattering of jpg artifacts, I'd imagine.

[knightime]

its a side effect that may occur
sucks to be you if you get it
also may cause sudden drop in the ability to spell words correctly
that also would suck but hey
gotta pay to look gorgeous sometimes
thankfully im pretty sure striders are immune to any such side effects

[restitchtime]

I don't know, I can think of a couple who might've succumbed to the unfortunate side effect of major dumbassery.

[knightime]

i have no idea who youre talking about
unless you mean yourself
i have not met any other strider who has succumbed to such ailments

[restitchtime]

Maybe you should take a look in the mirror sometime, because there'll be one staring dully right back at you. Just a suggestion.

[knightime]

you hurt me
my heart is bleeding profusely at how deep you wounded me
let me write all my feelings in my own blood
just for you
because i would never think to give you anything less than my entire soul

[restitchtime]

Not like I'd have accepted anything less anyway. Make sure your penmanship doesn't suck or I'll send that shit back.

[knightime]

it will be the fanciest fucking cursive
script that shit
all the curls you could ever hope for vomited onto a single sheet of poetic justice

[restitchtime]

Aww, that's sweet. Especially considering I don't think you even know how to write in cursive.

[knightime]

ouch
that hurts me right here
here being my heart
i hope you hear it
the sounds of it breaking just a little
need a bandaid for it and everything
you can name my bandaid if you want

[restitchtime]

Thanks, that meant a lot to me. I think I'll name it 'Overdramatic Prick' in honor of you as a return gift.

[knightime]

ill keep it forever
itll be added to my extensive collection of dead things
everyone will be jealous because they wished they had a bandaid as cool as mine and having it named by the rose strider

[restitchtime]

Top item in your urban taxidermy gallery? I don't think that I can handle an honor as big as that.

[knightime]

im sure you can handle it
all the gloating rights
they are yours

[restitchtime]

Damn, that's some serious faith in me you've got going on there. Didn't think you were that stupid.

[knightime]

im doomed to trusting people with the strider title
no thats probably a fucking lie
but hey
i really doubt anyone else understands time shit without having a couple of aneurysms first
theres that

[restitchtime]

It's really not that hard. But hey, who am I to deny myself some quality entertainment while people get the hang of magic bullshit powers?